Sorry, there are no polls available at the moment.

Articles & Posts

JW’s Honest Questions Lead to Isolation and Disfellowship, Then Finally to Answers, Joy and Fellowship


Here is the publication of the story of Kent from Sweden by his own hand.

 Searching for the true God and the meaning of life.

I grew up in the 70s. My childhood was filled with mixed emotions due to a separation between my parents and problems both in school and privately. A good friend of mine became diagnosed with diabetes at the age of 17 and soon after that her mother died in heart attack also after a couple years her father died. This together with worldwide starvation and other evil things made me depressed. When I was 24 years old, I began wondering, what is the meaning of this life? Where do we come from? Where are we going? Why is there so much evil in our world? As these thoughts grew stronger and stronger, I considered contacting a priest, to ask questions about these things. Time went by and suddenly two Jehovah’s Witnesses stood outside my door. I thought if they had the courage to visit me about discussing the Bible, why not invite them and ask them the questions I had.

 Starting to studying the Bible

At that time I began studying the Bible once a week and searched the scripture for the truth about God.  I remember my questions: Why is there so much evil in the world?  Who is God? Who is Jesus? Is there a true God?  One year later, I became convinced that I had found the truth in the JW Organization, so I was baptized in July of 1985. The brothers that studied with me told me that the fulfillment of 1914 predictions, when the World War I broke out, was proof that the Watchtower was Gods organization.

The thing is, in 1985 we had no computers and therefore it was not possible to research more deeply the Watchtower’s claims; so I joined them. My new faith made me a better person.  I stopped smoking, started to dress better, started to treat people more kindly and I became a better employee, I worked hard to try to prove to others that the Watchtower was God’s channel. My faith gave me something to live for and it gave meaning to my life. I worked for a year, to free myself from all my debts, so that I could start pioneering, which I did the following year. As the years went by, I experienced personal testing’s as I saw so much in the congregations that shocked me.

The elders exercised great power over the brothers and did not always treat them well.  I wondered why so many of the brothers and sisters had so many psychological problems. I concluded that one reason was because they were not allowed critical thinking, so they denied everything that they saw that shouldn’t “be in Gods Organization.”  Among these things was the fact that the Watchtower was for many years a “non governing organization” in the UN.  I was also bothered at how the elders handled situations. For example, we were not permitted to discuss different ways of understanding scriptures among the brothers.  So they would not even consider the possibility that the Watchtower might be wrong in some of their interpretations. When we deny these thoughts, suppress these feelings and pretend that they are not there, we will often feel depressed and mentally sad.

Isolation can lead to terrible things

For example I can tell you the story of a sister we can call her Nancy. She became a witness approximately the same time as I did around 1985. The thing is she gradually developed mental problems, not severe but anyway she had mental problems which developed gradually. In the beginning it was not even possible to see it. She longed to marry, but the time went by and she did not meet any brother. Well she tried to keep up with the standard in the congregation but she did not succeed. She became more and more isolated after a couple of years and I think that the reason was that she could not keep up with the standard. The sisters that where in the center of the congregation, did not give here so much attention, I think that they thought she was not a good witness. She did not have a fine home and she did not have those things that could make her interesting. She was not so very good on the platform and did not preach so many hours as the others thought she should. Anyway she became more and more isolated and when I meet here at the last days of her life, she said she was lonely, she had no really close friends. I tried to say to her that she should not rely only on the brothers in the congregation, but she should try to meet others, for example learn to paint, go on some course and meet others. She said Kent, we are not supposed to engage in meeting people outside, who are not active witnesses.

One elder said the day before she jumped out from a window in desperation on the 7: th floor “I do not feel sorry for her, we have told her to seek help from a Psychiatrist”. And the evening before she jumped she tried to get help by going to a sisters home, but the sister said when she knocked on her door, “go home and clean your apartment, I do not have time with you”.  The next day she jumped out from the window in desperation and probably died instantly.

The love we show has to be honest from the heart. If we say hello in the kingdom hall and do not pay any attention to each other when we meet on the street, it could hurt others deeply. We do not have to be perfect but “say what we mean and mean what we say”. If someone leaves all the things he or she has to come in to the congregation and we do not pay any attention to them year after year terrible things can happen.

Another problem arose when the congregation elders handled this situation or did not handle the situation. Because she was so isolated and everyone knew that she was depressed and disappointed, we were supposed to keep our mouth shut and not to talk about it. I remember I was furious and talked to a sister whose husband where an elder “we should not hide anything or try to pretend that it has not happened, we have to talk about this so that it does not happen again”. After I while I heard that her husband tried to build a judging committee and accuse me for blaming the elders for her death. This did not happen, but it was sad to hear that they saw it that way, when I just tried to say that we have to have a chance to talk about it because it affected the brothers.

Bible trained conscience

I also found out that many of the brothers and sisters did not always follow their own bible trained conscience. This probably was and is due to the fact that the organization is so strong and the governing body uses a so strong language to the members, thru the watchtower and the local elders. This has as result that the members follow the governing body and the elder’s advice, without so much really reflecting about it. An example of this is when members turn their head away, when they meet very long time friends that are disfellowshipped. Of course there are many other situations when the advice is well meant, but the motive is to comply with the organization. So we have to reach maturity in our understand of Gods will, so that we can make wise and good decisions, based on our understanding of the loving heavenly Father and his dear son Jesus Christ’s qualities.

I began to display my emotions more and more, and told the elders, when I saw things that should not be in “Gods organization”. The effect was that I became stigmatized, marginalized and more and more alone. I had fewer and fewer friends. Speaking out like this was something you should never do as a follower of the Watchtower. I became more and more disturbed about the way the organization handled things. I had a friend who worked at Bethel and through him I was informed about the hard rulership they followed. He had been working in all approximately 20 years at Bethel, when they suddenly, without no obvious reason, told him, “you have two weeks to pack your bags, and then we want you out of here”. He had no backup in society absolutely nothing he did not have an apartment, no work nothing.  I am sure Jehovah God helped him and today he has a nice family in a little local congregation, but it was not nice to treat someone like that, who have been working so hard for the society. There were many other things he told me about the fighting’s at the top of Bethel, fighting’s over prominence and who was going to be at the top and so forth. If you want to succeed as a Jehovah’s Witness you should comply, comply and comply, that’s something they really would appreciate and they will call you a very strong follower of the Watchtower.

I started to study Social Science at College in 2000, something they did not support. One reason for my interest in Social Science was that I wanted to understand all those negative processes that existed in the congregations. I took my degree after 4 years. When I was in college, I started a deep study on the Internet of some of the Watchtowers dearest truths.  I focused on the claim that they are God’s organization.

The Watchtower’s doctrines

The claim of authority in the Watchtower Organization has its root in the doctrine that God choose them as the only organization he would work with. They say that Jehovah choose the Watchtower Organization in 1918, three and a half years after he became King in 1914. They say that he came to his temple and cleansed it. To come to the year 1918 you first have to acknowledge the year 1914 as the year Christ became King and was given the rulership from God.  If this was true, then God choose the Watchtower, because, as they claimed, they were the only organization that truly served God.

Now I have to say, that today, I think that prophetically, the year 1874, is far more interesting than the year 1914. The reason for that is, the prophecy in Daniel 12, where it says that Daniel should wait 1290 days and 1335 days, and that the world would change drastically – the parousia came and so many interesting things happened; among them, the Jews came back to their land. As I see it the most important thing today is, to have faith in God his Christ and the Bible and reflect Gods and Christ’s most important quality Love.

One more thing that is important to mention here and that is the need the governing body has, for their claim of power, to be legitimate. This is why this prophetic application is so important to them. They say that after three and a half year from 1914 Christ came to his temple and choose the Watchtower among all Christian organizations. Today they admit that the judging of the temple is in the future, but nevertheless they say that God choose the Watchtower to be his only organization.

After discovering that the Watchtower was a non-governing organization at the UN (There where a big article in the Guardian at that time about this) and that they fought their own members at courts, so they wouldn’t have to pay money, (Members that where abused as children tried to fight the Watchtower legally, but many lost their trials against the Watchtowers lawyers.) Today Candice Conte is an example of someone that has succeeded in meeting the Watchtower legally. I started to wonder, could this really be God’s organization? I doubted that the brothers were all driven by Gods spirit and also that the Organization was driven by Gods spirit. I saw so much bad going on and no one dared to question the organization of fear they could be disfellowshipped.


I started to look at their claim that Gods Kingdom was set up the year 1914.  After I did this research, I confronted the Watchtower with what I had found. My claim in general was that I did not believe that Christ Kingdom over the earth started 1914.  After four months I got a reply, where they said they should send two elders to me and teach me the right understanding.  I said if you do not have any new material to present, I do not want to have a meeting.  In the end, they disfellowshipped me for being rebellious. The reason for the disfellowshipping was that I did not accept the brothers to have a meeting with me. The thing is I never for one minute questioned the Bible, on the contrary after my research of the scriptures involved I was more convinced than ever that the Bibles prophesies are still being fulfilled exactly as they are written in the Bible by God.

Actually the Watchtower’s attitude in this question has not gradually become softer and more merciful on the contrary more rigid and aggressive.  I called the Watchtowers headquarter in England for a couple of days ago to ask them more questions regarding the 1914 doctrine.  He asked me first who I was, when I said I want to be anonymous, he went further and asked me to send a mail to the writing department. I said I want to be anonymous, if I send in a question with a regular mail I have to give you my address otherwise you cannot reply. I want to be anonymous, then he said but if you give me your address two elders can visit you and help you understand this doctrine. We don’t answer this kind of question anymore over the telephone. The reason he said was that it is so deep and complicated so they do not want to answer these kind of question regarding the year 1914, via telephone. Actually this shows that instead of trying to help someone, they want to track them down, so that they could come and visit you and find out if you are a brother or an interested person. If you are a brother and you do not comply with the Watchtowers 1914 doctrine, they will probably disfellowshipped you to avoid the members to be infected with this poison. 

Now I was alone, really alone and it was difficult to start a new life without my old friends and the support from them. A couple of years went by, when I did not engage in any Bible studies.  I was bitter and was working to find a new way. I was thinking that the material from Russell always stood the tests and was so inspiring. I read them over and over after I came in to the organization, because the material about the Christian calling so strongly appealed to me. I read most of what I came over from the old books and became convinced that this was for me. I struggled much with this for many years in the Watchtower. They treated any younger ones as mentally diseased if they partook of the emblems. In 2002 I partook of the emblems anyway after communicating with some other anointed brothers mainly from USA.

Meeting the Bible Students

So now I remembered that I had heard that the Bible Students still existed, though they were small in numbers. I searched the Internet and came in contact with a very nice sister that I had email contact with. We discussed doctrines as “the Great Company (Great Crowd), the ransom for all, the return of the Israelites to their homeland and so forth. I did not agree at once, however I began a process of thinking about these things. Suddenly, I began to experience a time of severe trials both at my work and also privately, which distracted me away from my new feelings.  At first, I did not think so much about but it, however after some time I wondered why these difficult personal trials came now?  I concluded it was due to the fact that I had started to communicate with the Bible Students. Satan wanted to discourage me from my new path. I took up the discussions which led to the situation where I rearranged my thinking in many of the doctrines as, the Great Company, the ransom for all and the return of the Jews to their land. I have gradually more and more adjusted my understanding of different prophecies.

And a couple of weeks ago I was invited to a convention in Hannover Germany by Brother Allen Springer. I went there by train and boat. It was a wonderful time I had those days and I will never forget it. The brethren took care of me in a wonderful way and they made my time there a memory for life. I was used to conventions with the witnesses and this was so much more spiritually up building.  So now I look forward to the International Convention in Poland next autumn.

I think that it is good to listen to the Bible Students understanding of the scriptures and take into consideration all the scriptures involved and pray to God for help in understanding them. It is good to be honest and listen, as the Berean Christians did and search the scriptures to see if it is as they say. Another thing that has made impact on me is the negative consequences that a man made organization can have on its followers. Despite the fact that some of the Watchtower’s doctrines are in harmony with the scriptures such as Gods name, Christ’s role in the kingdom, the 144 000 and that there is no hell fire and so forth; in contrast many of Russell’s teachings were changed, mainly by Judge Rutherford.  Brother Russell never supported the idea that some men in Brooklyn named themselves a governing body and ruled over the organization and its members.


I really have to say that I met so many really spiritual-minded brothers and sisters and they meant so much to me. I do not doubt for one second that the brothers and sisters that feared God and loved the Bible were also loved by God and Christ. But what was disturbing was that they claimed that this was Gods organization and therefore no one dared to question things. I was also glad that I came to know the truth and Gods purpose through Jehovah’s Witnesses, but I see so many brothers’ hearts directed to a man made organization instead of using their Bible trained conscience and following the Bibles principles.

An example of this is when brothers say “the Watchtower says” or “the Watchtower teaches” instead of God says or the Bible teaches. The consequence was that they feared the organization more than God. When their hearts where directed this way they could treat the brothers really bad, almost in an evil way and think that they did God’s will.

Today I must say that I am so grateful for all I have learned both as a Jehovah’s Witness and also as a Bible Student. God has so lovingly cared for me all these years, through all my different experiences. I do not have time here to discuss all these things, but I feel that God always has taken care of me, though some experiences have been really difficult. We learn so much and are growing when we are loyal through the trials. We just have to go on forward and not look back on what we have left. I can honestly say that if someone really loves Jehovah God for who He is, studies the scriptures and has a strong faith in the scriptures, I think that God will help and protect such a one. He will probably not hinder all the trials and problems a brother has to go through, however Jehovah will probably let him learn important things from the different experiences. God will surely also answer a prayer for a right understanding and in his right time and will give the right understanding. The Christian walk is not easy but it so worth it, because to grow in likeness of God and Christ is so wonderful and one day maybe God can say “well done my servant”.

Despite being with the Jehovah’s Witness Organization, when we are humble and honest in our heart, we can make progress in our relationship with God and Christ and we will grow from day to day to be more mature. Love is also something that we have to both learn and develop and God will help us. So Gods eyes are searching all over the earth to give strength and help, to those that really love him and his wonderful plan. 2 Chron 16:9 (my favorite scripture).

Your brother in Christ.

23 comments to JW’s Honest Questions Lead to Isolation and Disfellowship, Then Finally to Answers, Joy and Fellowship

  • Gasa

    Sri m Davis. I wholeheartedly agree with your comments on Disfellowshiping. I am an active witness I have been disfellowshed in the past and reinstated but I truly agree that shunning is not something Christ even did. Even with Satan Jesus communicated with him even if it was to say ‘go away’. He remained respectful. Your point about treating a disaplined brother as a person of the world or tax collector is a very good point. I was baptised in 1973 and continue not to understand why President Knorr in 1953 copied the Catholic practice of excommunication. Shunning and its practice is causing serious problems for our brothers in Russia. Legal authorities have claimed this practice breached certain human rights articles. Maybe Satans political system will force the governing body a change of policy.

  • Hi i have a ques can someone be disfellowship if they marry a person thats not in the truth ..if there a jahovas witness

  • ari m davies

    I just briefly want comment upon disfellowshipping and upon shuning people
    The Bible does say to remove the evil man from your midst okay I think that that is prudent with somebody it keeps committing and open and repetitive sin and tries to bring it into the Christian congregation and tell everybody hey follow me but there needs to be an understanding and a limit to this you can’t go about treating a person that was once a brother any worse than you would a pagan or a tax collector the Bible says exactly that if you bring it before the church and that person still doesn’t listen to you let that person be to you as a pagan or a tax collector now we don’t go about disrespecting the tax collector just you disrespect the tax collector and see what happens to you you don’t disrespect the pagans either you work with people everyday that aren’t part of your church that you know don’t believe in God and you work with them closely to receive money from your employer and you talked to them and associate with them therefore when you’re dealing with somebody that has been disfellowshipped from the Christian congregation you cannot possibly under any circumstance treat those people any worse than the people that you work with for money otherwise let’s get real you’re a spiritual prostitute! The whole purpose of disfellowshipping is to protect the Christian congregation from the cancer of sin but you don’t stop there if you really are Christian you do everything in your power to get that sick member out of his sickness and back to being Christian but if that person refuses then when you see him on the street you say hello you show common courtesy you don’t run over to his house and hang out with him but if he comes over to your house and asked you for hey friend can I borrow your rake so I can rake up my yard you don’t slam the door in his face and say you’re disfellowshipped we don’t talk to you and yes this is exactly what I have seen in certain corners if somebody who’s disfellowshipped comes to you and say hey can I borrow your rake so I can rake up my yard sure I’ll go get it for you hand him the rake and go back to your business what’s wrong with that? So you’re in a restaurant and somebody that’s disfellowshipped happens to sat down at a table across from you do you turn your back to this person and treat him like he has a disgusting body odor and turn up your nose at him no he say hi Joe good to see you you go about and get your food sit down and eat.

    Now I want to get a little bit personal here with disfellowshipping because I was baptized as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses back in 1975 as long as I attended Jehovah’s Witnesses I never brought uncleanness or Rebellion into the Kingdom Hall and I was never publicly reproved or disfellowshipped I left voluntarily I won’t go into it in this particular paragraph but I have been back to the Kingdom Hall to visit now and again and to this very day not one person has ever shunned me to this very day they don’t call me mr. Davies they call me brother they let me comment at the Watchtower and if I feel like going to pick up boxes of literature for them I’ve never had them turn me down that’s the way it should be among all religions if you come to church dressed clean and behaving yourself then nobody should turn up their nose at you I personally believe that you should be accepted on a day-to-day basis or rejected on a day-to-day basis if you come to church and you’re a baptized member of the church and you’re wearing clothes with holes in it for a fashion statement and you smell somebody needs to tell you hey those are appropriate clothes for church and you stink go take a bath but if a man who is disfellowshipped or a woman who is disfellowshipped effort to talk about God respectively and is well behaved in the church while they’re there they need to be treated for that day as if they were welcome and I will end it there.

  • Ione

    Thank you so much for your kind encouragement. I will continue to read the articles on the site, and of course, my Bible for the strength. My mate has supported me, especially in the past few months, since he has seen just how manipulative and unbending some on these men can be. I think it hurt to him to have his eyes opened like this, but a little pain is bearable if it leads us to the greater truth, right ?

    • Jacqueline

      Right, it can be like a forest fire. When it is over the growth is ravagingly beautiful.
      I think we are on a journey and the tested quality of our faith will clean off all the dross and leave us so the word of God can get through. I have to really appreciate having been a witness and had many experiences
      With those in positions. I was able to see for sure what was happening as a giant organization emerged. Now I can ignore them and am free to think and question,discuss without being labeled.
      I woke up with your comment on my mind. God knows I had similar experiences but got sidetracked with witness doctrine. There is a ton of articles on this site. They make sense. Understanding some of the scriptures we often misused has really humbled me. I thought we knew the bible but something seemed wrong and I guess it is because it got too organizational. Holy Spiritwasn’t a with the Sanhedrin which was much like the governingbody. It was with a little band of followers. I hope we prove to be an encouragement to you.
      Please overlook us when we have to seize control over the site so it doesn’t lose it’s purpose for being created. It is to be a friend to the witnesses that are fleeing the organization. To offer a landing place until they get on their feet. Not to have them wake up to entire magazine articles being reproduced on the site. This offers a Bible perspective and what the Original Bible Students really taught before Br. Rutherford started his organization. We don’t try to make you accept what you can’t understand or even if you don’t see it that way. You are still welcome to give your honest view. The Jw.org has a website with it’s view published. This is the other side of the coin for your review.sincerely Jacqueline

  • Ione

    I had a very bad experience with so-called brothers speaking outright lies about me living an immoral lifestyle that went on for over a year. I think the dislike of me stems from several issues, No. 1 being that I have a college education and express my own thoughts — and I’m a woman (this appears to be like spitting in the eye to some of the brothers). I’m also from a large metropolitan area and living in a small rural area, so I’m “a foreigner” in the eyes of some. An elder who had a lot of clout was the original source of the issue. So many methods were used to intimidate and silence me.

    I don’t wish to be long-winded but I’ll list a few of them: spreading false rumors, coming to my home unannounced and uninvited, lying in wait for me to walk by so they could engage me in a debate, attempting to end my marriage by turning my mate against me, attempting to damage my relationship with my only child with false rumors and distortions of the truth. Some of the rumors were ridiculous, I actually laughed at them — to their faces. The silliest one being that the city in which I was married does not exists — a fact easily verifiable by looking on the internet — or reading a map ! They even went as far as to tell these rumors to my neighbors, after which they attempted to force me to go out and witness to these same people — with my character demolished — by them ! They even involved the local police deputy in attempting to persecute me, by, get this — forbidding me to take a walk! One of the elders even suggested that my mate beat me to prevent me from going! (I depend on the benefits of walking for my health.)

    Fortunately, I live in such a small town, the deputy was able to observe what was happening and realized I was being railroaded. Even though I proved the rumors false with documents like my marriage license, this elder and his buddy elder decided to disfellowship me. I was beyond livid and swore I would appeal any such decision with the circuit and take them to court for defamation and willful infliction of emotional damage cause by the fallout from their lies. Their efforts continued until I told them in no uncertain terms that I was ready to proceed with legal action if they didn’t desist in stalking me in my home.

    Finally, the goons decided that matters had gone far enough. I left the local congregation, unable to trust or respect the men who had orchestrated what felt like the destruction of my life. For the sake of my mate, we are not in a different congregation where we are treated respectfully.

    At this point, I am trying to move forward and be positive, but I am experiencing real trauma from these events. Memories that I have tried to block from my mind keep resurfacing, interfering with my life in many respects. I don’t feel that I can trust anyone associated with the organization with my true thoughts.

    I’m not sure what to do. I have read from the WT library and I know the literature recommends praying for those who sinned against me and to forgive them that seems impossible for me at this time. Does anyone have any recommendations ?

    • Jacqueline

      Lone hello, and welcome. I am so sorry to hear what happened to you, my. Normally you are some sort of threat when they go after you to destroy your reputation. For instance if you are discredited about your marriage or anything then if you know about immoral conduct on the part of powerful ones in the area, they want believe YOU. They keep the eye on you to distract from what they are doing. My son said he was taught this tactic when being groomed to be suggested for elder.
      How can everybody have the same experiences???.
      If God is calling you out it may take all of that to make you come to him. This seems to be a constant happening.
      Think about it your deep personal life should not be their concern,especially since you have a head, your husband. Don’t blame yourself, adultery, is rampant in the congregations a lot being elders. Since the advent of the disease aids it happens among members. It used to be the elder would have a non witness but this changed in the 90’s.
      Trauma can be dilabilitating if you don’t take a break. Once persons are shown to be a certain way in the organization they act according to rules so they seldom change unless the rules change.
      You are welcome here to heal and get balance. Please consider the articles. Comment and ask questions.

    • Jacqueline

      lone we haven’t forgot about you. The re writing of the jw.org site in some of the comments causes yours to drop to the bottom. So as David continues his excellent dialogue with Br. Peter there are ones that want to talk to you. We are at a 2 day convention this weekend but we see the comments and will respond.
      So to keep you from being buried by the witnesses litzing with their long postings, move to this page and I will tell ones to click on it and it will be you.
      Just talk and we see your comments.
      How are you doing this morning? Don’t let anyone come between you and your husband, guard it from the intrusion of elders in this way. The governing body knows that a house divided will not stand so keep theo out of your house. They will destroy you and your children relationships also.
      Do you have questions on any of the subjects? We will let only Bible Students answer you so you don’t have to be abused by the organization stuff that you have heard already. So feel free to talk.
      We will hope that the witnesses on this site will use proper decorum and realize you aren’t asking to have the witness site copy and pasted to you. You can go to the local kingdom hall for that.
      Will check for your comments today. Take Care

    • Jacqueline

      Lone me again I was hurrying out the door earlier to get to the convention on time.
      One thing that helped me to recover from abuse from the organization was learning more about Jesus instead of the organization, which stood in his place a little to much for me.
      What happened on Calgary when Christ said it is done, is all we need. It was laid to rest on that day and we can now approach Jehovah thru Him only. We don’t need an intercessor in the form of a corporation with a man appointed governing body. I don’t know how to copy paste links with my phone yet, but look to the left and find the articles about organization and governingbody.
      Once you see you can actually go to GOD thru Jesus without going thru this organization you will feel a freeness and the Holy Spirit will be able to help you. Comment or ask questions or just read and look up scriptures. You have been freed by God thru CHRIST, don’t give the organization afree permission slip into your life. Your life has value don’t give your allegiance to Christ away.Take Care

    • Dundee

      My heart bleeds for you. I can certainly relate. We can never fully say we understand because each of us have a bit of a different twist to our story. Our own unique experience with in these unneccessary traumas. But I can relate to this indeed.
      I dealt with the stalking visits continually! It didn’t stop until I listened to Sr.Jacquelines advice & Brother Peter’s, to be more forceful & direct, but with my own flair. I would tell them I respect their authority, because to be honest I don’t like to disrespect people that have authority or position. But that they were bringing fear into the heart of someone in this house i was caring for. That they were violating my civil rights. There are freedoms here that can be enforced.That they are to back off. Stop the unnannounced surprise visits, that these types of visits are unwelcome. I also said that I’m dealing with a personal family problem & that IF i decide I need the Elders help then I will be the one to initiate contact. That was one cong. Another one, the local cong.that I live in their territory, i did something else that I cannot say in this forum.But lets just say that at present they are respecting my “Do not call, Do not knock” request for their own fears of what will happen if they tresspass again. These ones Df’d me some years ago due to taking sides with my adulterous wife(now ex).They destroyed my marriage to the point i had to divorce her for safety.Lets just say i had always had humility, but they took to REALLY teaching a lesson in humility that could not of sprung from our merciful Jehovah. Sadly i had to meet with a new cong judicial committee to discuss things i didn’t want to talk about.But they saw i had brought proof as to the other bodies fraudelant behavior, all three said that i was falsely disfellowshipped. But they showed me a way to write a plea letter, one of much self-restraint…that after months of them ignoring, these elders convinced the others to meet with me. It was 50 minutes of pure torture the original committee telling me how I’m from the Devil & will be destroyed.I prayed as Nehemiah, also that whole week prior I prayed that Jehovah can override each one of them by name. the last 5 minutes they reinstated me(55 minute meeting)I was & am a humble brother. I kept very controlled & showed respect. But I tactfully let them know to redirect their energies not to look for something to keep me out, but rather what I am saying correctly. I was very sincere. They let me back in. But then the backlash from all the friends saying the most horrible stuff to me. Yet my wife was continuing to be immoral with her boyfriend & now has HIV. Even though she turned the elders against me, & I have like no real friends anymore in the circuit, just conditional friends, she now may lose her life. She said she had control over the elders to turn them on me & taunted me, now I am reinstated & I have my health & she does not.What if it turns to AIDS soon??
      At present I’ve found comfort among these Bible Students who worship Jehovah God, mention his name often enough, & respect Jesus rightful role in the arrangement. I have circumstances where i cannot attend often, but when i do, they speak of the deep things of God. Like the height, the depth, the breath, the length of spiritual things. Very deep infact.But they are showing me in scripture answers to my lifes deepest questions that weren’t answered within Jw.& the abuse. I still keep in contact with a few & regularly take my doses of disrespectful expressions aimed in my direction.Judgemental comments. Been told I will die. I speak up to them & I get physically sick. I do not tell them I attend somewhere else. They don’t need to know. I just say I’m outside the circuit. I had in the past gotten cancer from their relentless attacks.This is icing on the cake.There’s more abuse, an exhausting list. I had to go for emotional clearings at a certain natural doctor that has helped me. But I still have bitterness inside, & sadness.But being among the Bible Students they’ve helped me piece together WHY these events happened to ME. But still had needed more clearings. Its a process to heal. Please unload your thoughts to Dear Sister Jacqueline.She is a fine sister, worshiper of Jehovah, & has the qualifications to help you emotionally. Brother Peter is a fine example of an Elder who shows emotions that a shepherd would have on literal sheep. He is my therapy about 3x a week. They both are such good friends. This is a very emotional issue, these abuses. Utilize her help or their help. Please pray, pray, pray & study. I would recommend the Scriptures as well as the Studies in the Scriptures. Particularly if you can go to a convention or tie in via the laptop. I’m listening to one now live. It is a continual process to heal & learn & have an open mind how Jehovah is working out the situation for your eternal benefit. I feel I was called out. Not allowed to be tempted beyond what I can bear, but along with the temptation made the way out so I can endure. You have to pray to make Jehovah’s plan clearer for you in particular. Because I am my own story.
      Please know, my dear friend, that there are many that can feel your pain & I appreciate you sharing your experiences.It resonates with me. I know it resonates with others. Please continue to share with us so we can pray for you. You will also be helping us to realize that our experiences weren’t perceived in our own heads. May Jehovah bless you. Know that he is near to those who are crushed & broken in their hearts.Psalm 34:18

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>