Romans 8:28 promises, “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” NASV. All of us desire to be close to our God Jehovah and his son, Jesus Christ. We long for their comfort, guidance and encouragement in our lives. We are promised in Isaiah 26:3, “You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You.” NKJV. Yet when difficult and harsh experiences come, we sometimes feel alone and afraid. In Hebrews 13:5 we read, “God Himself has said, “I will never, never let go your hand: I will never never forsake you.” Weymouth. You are not alone. Your heavenly Father and his Son are watching over you. You are not alone. There are others like you who have experienced hard trials and difficult experiences. Take some time to share with us. To tell your story. To encourage others. That is what this Testimony section is for.
Today my heart has been in turmoil!! Recently I wrote my dad to make peace with him because he has not spoken to me since my departure from JW. My being a Bible Student helps me to realize what Jehovah God would expect of me, to make peace. He writes me this letter & was received today. I’m writing it exactly as I’m reading it.
Good to hear from you. Between the C.O.visit & Convention this weekend, couldn’t write sooner…….. Hope the grandchildren are doing well. As for me, think of you always. Sad to think that we can’t get along & things seperate us. I love you too.
I’m shocked by the tone of the letter you wrote me. It appears to me that this borders on apostasy. Have you been viewing or listening to apostates.??
FOR EXAMPLE
1)The spiritual climate in Cong.is Toxic.
2)The literature & Conventions hypnotically influence us to hate family members that are not worshiping Jehovah.
3)Narrow minded view that Jesus died for J.W.only.
4)How you have allowed yourself to be in such an environment for years – amidst wolves.
5)At Convention, I should be careful as to what is said.
Info is coming from men not Jehovah.(#5 here is a twisting of my letter.I said to listen if he hears or reads things like hating your family if they don’t do what you do in the organization.Notice how he says I said ALL the info coming from convention is man made.I never said this)
6)What are you preaching, or teaching others?
7)Its good that you read Bible daily, &Talk to Jehovah in the park.
Yet isolating yourself from Christian Cong.is a recipe for disaster.
8)In your letter you state that you have extracted you and your family from a damaging environment(is that from Jehovah’s Cong.?)
9)You say that you are associating with people of like mind, and spirit.(Who are they?)
10)What special place do you feel you belong in (Heaven?)
Its interesting to me that over the yrs you attended several Cong.yet all of God’s people are out to hurt you.(Here again is a twisting of my letter.I mentioned about sum,not all,cause there are good ones in the organization I’ve crossed paths with).
ALL have had a spiritual Toxic environment. Where have you learned the Truth about Jehovah? By faithful slave class in Jehovah’s Cong. Made up of Imperfect people.You write that the bo’s are stalking you. At some time you say they are isolating your family, not caring for the sheep.Its LOSE,LOSE situation for those bro’s.You asked for help,Yet refuse their help.Its unbelievable this situation.(I said I asked for help & the elder said ok, this will take time, 2+ months later he shares a scripture with me in the back room with door closed,then the friends ask what i did wrong to be in the back room,no help rendered until months later was my point.)Its because of this that I find HARD TO BELIEVE that I have a problem.Talking to you,Your life is so problematic that If I suggest anything you are upset. Me too.(My father had suggested suicide & different means to carry it out, I get upset with that,anyone would) In the beginning in each cong.they helped your family.Why would they all of a sudden change.Every Cong.you have attended this has happened to you.
Its time to do as Apostle James request – look in Mirror – soul searching and examine self. I’m sorry but this Type of Thinking is delusional & paranoia. I realize that I have issues and problems with my moods and personality. But I’m afraid that you have inherited some problem genes. Please look up these definitions. Please, when you go to a therapist address these issues.Our problem is not only me, but how you view things.
I write these words with heavy heart.I love you. But can’t justify your actions Towards Jehovah’s Cong. When or if you Call or write, please don’t justify your actions. Just let me know if you disassociated yourself from Jehovah’s Cong. I could understand your being inactive or isolating yourself. But can’t understand your shocking thoughts about Cong.Members.(I had told him a brother wanted to molest my daughter & the Watchtower didn’t show any concern.)
Never did I think that you would take this disagreement between us to this level.
You need to let me know where you stand!
Would love to talk or thru letter, & have a relationship with you. But it seems it can’t be spiritual level. I do not hate you or anyone in your family, thats absurd. We seem to be on again off again relationship & take offence at everything each other says. Think that medication or therapy could help. Dont take this to mean that I don’t have issues, problems too, am Trying to work out my own demons, no pun intended.Hope you take this letter in the spirit in which its written.I’m saddened at your situation in life. Each will carry their own load and answer for their actions.
Love you very much,
no matter how this turns out
Dad
Dundee, read 1&2 Peter the entire books so your heart can heal. I will pray and talk indoor tomorrow. Battery dying in RV.
Sr.Jacueline,
I just finished reading aloud the book of 1 Peter. Tomorrow I will read 2 Peter. Already the dark feeling in my chest has turned away. I thank you for letting me know to read this, for i would not have slept. My father knows how to reach deep into someones soul & change their countenance. I believe his words to be satanic poison. Thankfully God’s Word can provide an antidote.
I read 2 Peter this day. Very appropriate reading. I thank you again. Was too tired to go to my car to get my DNKJV(Divine Name King James Version) so I read it from the revised JW bible, is beautiful passages. Next I’ll read it from the DNKJV,to get the full understanding. I want to really meditate on these books, and see what God thru the Apostle Peter was bringing out..
Dundee,Philippians 3.13 forget the things behind and straining forward for the things ahead. Your father is a test and trial for you, you really love him and his acceptance or understanding of your decision is important as with all son father relationships. Your father is weak from his letter. But to say I understand would to me condone his weakness. Most men within the JW organization are neutered, they refer to the organization as if it is the same as God. They let an organization and other men dictate their family matters. This is not normal behavior but the opposite. Men get other men out of their family. He is not good it seems at this time for your mental and emotional health.
Suicide or in my case, my son hopes I will die before Armageddon so I get a resurrection, for JW believed the dead comes back because death pays for your sins not the Ransom. So that is why he suggests suicide. STRANGE TEACHING, quite a few of the entire family murder suicides are JW. Google it and be shocked.
I don’t explain to my family what is wrong with the organization but instead what I have learned about Armageddon and the Ransom, Israel, the Man of Sin. These truths they seem to listen to but not if I contrast it with the JW. Other words they can talk about all religions and the Catholic church but it is taboo to speak against their gods, the nine member governingbody.
Remembering this one point will allow you to speak to your father or any witnesses. I don’t condone or understand such abnormal behavior but it is a average witnesses.
Grandchildren, wow, this hurts. He is missing out on a lot, they keep you humble and Loving.
Remember Job, God was with him but he suffered at the same time. Non greater than John the baptist but he was permitted to die, so suffering that almost breaks your heart is how satan works.. Your dad will destroy you with this type of demeaning talk. It is typically the way the CO and watchtower beats down grown men. Tell us when you want to explain why you left, we will be there my little brother!! But your father isn’t being a father, he is acting with no natural affection as foretold by Christ. He is old enough to know you are his son. Use his harshness toward the governingbody but not toward your child how cruel. You might be better off without such conversations. Wait and let him come to you if you can. You are up against demonic forces. A father doesn’t talk to his son about suicide but JW do it a lot. Perhaps God knows and is protecting you and your family. Some at the convention say they saw your comment but was speechless. May God give you peace. We are his agents to be used to stick by you until you pull thru, keep talking until you have the strength to say get behind me satan to your father. Take care, in Jesus.
Dieter – Thanks. I read your comments and a related link. I am quite confused. Perhaps I just can’t keep up with you. So you get the last word. I won’t try to respond. Best wishes.
Br.Peter & Sr. Jacqueline,
I’ve meditated on your words both here in this forum & on the phone. I’ve read these Bible verses. I’ve prayed to Jehovah. I’ve made a decision to reply to my dad as I cannot control the words that are pouring from my soul. Whether what I’m doing is wrong or right, I do not know. All I can say is that there are feelings inside that are a fire in my bones as Jeremiah. So I want to retype what I’ve written to him. I will need to edit sum names so as to keep this as discrete as possible atleast for the time being..
Dear Father,
I hope this letter finds u well & in good health. You’re reply shows that we resume where we left off when you hung up on me in January of this year. I do find it sad we don’t seem to get along. I did not hang up on you dad. And so we have drifted very far since. We used to work together & handle the most stressful of jobs. And we used to ski in the most frigid of weather conditions up in…….. And enjoy beautiful vacation spots & you’d take care of me when I’d be ill. We’d also serve our Creator together in the cong. I thank you for the fun times together in my memories & your taking care of the families needs.
Fortunately my close relationship with my heavenly father, Jehovah God, pulls me thru any situation that hurtles my direction, that’s why i mentioned in my letter that we’ll be fine, we are ok dad. I rely much upon Jehovah & His Holy Spirit. He has helped me greatly & He is aware of all things, even if humans or family do not want to acknowledge any abuses that took place behind closed doors. Hence why God seems to provide answer to my silent supplications with my inner voice of petition to him. Humans only like to judge, or look into a microscope at things focusing on the wrong things, & overlooking other important details. Looking for things closely that seem to fit into their limited understanding. You seem to feel I’m an apostate. If worshiping Jehovah & putting on a Christlike personality is apostasy, then wow! I don’t know what to say. I’ve been called worse! I’m grateful the WT Library is organized in such a way to share scriptures & articles when dealing with a crisis, so that I can keep God’s & His sons thoughts on matters. It is very difficult for me when I have to deal with unreasonable people, whomever I might cross paths with. Unreasonableness always leads to irreconcilable differences. You’re twisting my letter to fit what you believe about me. Allow me to express myself! You’re picking apart & looking closely in a microscope. However even a jeweler will realize that he could look at the most beautiful of diamonds & in his eyeglass looking closely, he will always see the imperfections. However when taking away the spectacles, he will see a beautiful jewel! You look too closely & judge me harshly, according to a limited perspective. Jehovah has a broader scope of vision & see’s & hears everything. You piece together words & pieces of my sentences to judge the ENTIRE situation when you have no idea whatsoever my life’s events. Until we reverse polarity that magnet, there is an invisible force repelling us to the farthest points of the map. Perhaps we will always have these irreconcilable difference. Or we can agree to disagree. You & I are completely different personalities. You’re mom & dad criticized all the time from what I remember, though I loved them dearly, it was demoralizing the things your father would say to me in private. I can only imagine your experiences with them & the pain its caused you thru the years.
I realized when I came to visit with you something. Criticizing my child when at the weakest with Breathing difficulty. You & your wife taking turns saying that everything is in the mind, when you are not in the field of study of medicine but read self help books outside the Watchtower Org that lead you to your conclusions. Then I find out from others that you &……. not only told sum that something is wrong with my childs mental state but that i had an alleged nervous breakdown when once being disfellowshiped years ago. How you could tell people this is shocking to hear it come from others. Slander travels fast. I was never diagnosed with that except from you, my father. That hurt a lot! Were you trying to damage my reputation? Or just trying to hurt me? Or just being insensitive? People talk, no one keeps secrets. Therefore my trust is shattered! I went to bat for you. I stood up to my ex’s family & Brother………..who had every intention on NEVER letting you back into the congregation. I faced my fear of them & stood up to get you back in. I believe those men would of ensured that you would have been overcome by depression before letting you back in. How many decades before the High Priest died & let you back into the fold? Even …………. (a fellow elder)voiced their plan to never reinstate you.
You altered my life when you decided to deal treacherously with my mother. I have understanding why, I accept what happened, but i couldn’t leave her helpless also. So I’ve stayed with her these……….(#ofyrs)since your departure, & its been severely rough experiences! For someone with that past, you sit in a judgement seat against me? However I worship the true God, & it has been entrusted to his son & the 144,000 to judge me during the millenial rule. Jehovah knows where i stand on his side. No one is going to give me ideas to dissassociate myself.
You don’t have your facts straight. When I asked my brothers for help cause I was overcome with sadness in the cong, you constantly telling me about suicide or describing ways with your sense of humor to carry it out. Brother……telling me i worship at the devils alter,etc. Brother……..getting even with me calling me an apostate when I was only trying to get my scriptural freedom letter sent to …………congregation so I wouldn’t be judicially handled as Brother ……….. told me I would be if they don’t get this letter, if i started dating or married. Well my brothers waited 2 1/2 months to share me even one thought of encouragement thru a scripture, one crumb so to speak. At that point I saw the lack of Christlike emotion in their long delay to help me.At that point i checked out from the …………cong. as many have already left for the same reasons i have seen. You’re twisting that thought when you said i wasn’t accepting of their help. This is the background why. Then after they saw i wasn’t attending for 5 months later stalking begins, until it brought fear into my mother that I asked them to stop on account of my mothers health & what she goes thru from their stress. Don’t believe it, doesn’t matter to me, dad. You don’t acknowledge anything i say. You belittle me & try to manipulate my thinking. I must think as you do exactly. That can’t happen! That won’t happen. I am a different entity. You have a controlling personality. I see it with your wife when i was there visiting. You are sarcastic & downright mean to her. I don’t know how she can deal with it. It was so uncomfortable for me to see you treat her that way. When she asks what you need at the grocery store..your sarcasm begins. You have to control people. You don’t realize it. That’s what repels me. Acknowledge my experiences, you don’t do. you attack my mental abilities saying something is wrong mentally & i need medication you say. If people don’t think your thoughts they need mental pills. You are so wrong! I am ashamed when people ask me if you have a relationship with the grandchildren & my children have to tell them you’re uninterested in their life as a grandfather. Yet you worship Jehovah? Yet you won’t call your family. This is your loss. Perhaps if the system were to last & you become a very old man, you may want your family blood line back in your life to care for you. Your moms stubborness to reconcile disagreements is prominent here. It’s fine dad. You know when you were disfellowshipped I spoke to you. You wouldn’t stop speaking spiritual things even when I asked you to stop. I wasn’t supposed to have dealings with you but my love for you went beyond that LAW.
When I visited you when you lived…………….my wife & i saw a lottery ticket on your kitchen counter. We looked at each other in shock! I never judged you. You were never aware that i saw that. If the brothers saw that, you would have been judged. I’m sure you’ll deny the lottery ticket & just say its in my mind. But i’m sure if I were to speak to my ex wife, she wouldn’t hesitate to commit that to writing & send that eyewitness testimony to your brothers as you & her are enemies. But thats in the past. I don’t judge you for that lottery ticket. I don’t know the full story as to why it was there when we arrived, & I was walking to the bathroom & saw it. Then called my wife over & she nearly passed out!
I love spending time with the old timers such as………..,……..&……… & the numerous kind jw’s that i cross paths with on a regular basis. I work for some, they are beautiful people. However if you spread your own opinions of my being an alleged apostate, you would affect my business as i work for some jw’s & they would fire my services, causing a financial loss to your family over here.
I am greatly offended that you would refer to your son as someone that has defected from Jehovah. however this does not surprise me in this world. You’ve always been critical of me. Our Lord said “People will deliver you up to tribulation & kill you, & you will be objects of hatred by all the nations on acct.of my name.”Matt.24:9
“Brother will deliver up brother to death, and a father his child.”Matt 10:21
Why are you feeling pity on me for my situation in life?? Mom & I are doing well. You must of misinterpreted my letter, cause i never said we weren’t doing fine. I have never felt better! Am in good spirits. And have a closeness with my Heavenly Father you’re not acknowledging either. Questioning me with regards to my place in God’s Kingdom if I make it there? You think of me as a failure, this is what shapes your opinions. All that you piece together will ONLY lead you to that conclusion. But you’re not my judge. Christ was given that role. We are just fine & happy here. For the meantime, I have a positive attitude & a love for Jehovah that no one or any force will take away from me. Romans 8:35-39
I also have a reasonable mind & Christlike love in my heart.
Again, father, I love you very much. Love never fails. It covers a multitude of sins. 1 Peter 4:8. And Colossians 3:12-14 is appropriate. Jehovah God doesn’t want a father & son to not have a relationship. I expressed to you what i feel is happening. You’re hearing something or listening to something that condones our present relationship. Then you filled in the blank & mentioned it was to “hate those not worshiping Jehovah”so by your own admission that teaching exists. I hit a nerve & you’re backed against a wall so come back with that I’m a borderline apostate. But my family & I daily worship at Jehovah’s alter. I am just aware that something is manipulating you to steady your course. You believe that to be correct. That is what I was referring to being from man. You twisting my letter to say ALL things they say are man made. Never said that dear father. you jumped to a conclusion again. I read & listen also the same insight as you regularly. But I listen very closely. I know what our heavenly father wants of us. And I continue to learn more about Him. Atleast I’ve told you this side of the veil my feelings. Jehovah will correct all matters in his timetable, according to his plan. When he removes the reproach of the people, when he removes sin from us, this will be made clear. You’ll recall our conversation, & will understand what I’ve been alerting you. It will be easier for all of us when those days shall arrive. My plan is seeing you there. The end of your letter suggest you might think i have a different fate.
Let God be the judge my father, let him figure out all of our places in his Kingdom arrangement. Just do your part & we will do ours here. I have worked for so many people in my business, I have seen so many good people that confide in me the things they do for the Lord mimic the things JW’s do. I don’t believe God will destroy them cause they are not jw religion. If that’s apostasy please mail this letter to……………..he will have a field day accusing me of apostasy & he can get his wish to have me kicked out. I will not recant that thought even if you believe Jehovah is a destroyer of everyone outside the jw. You always taught me how Jehovah hates this, hates that, hates this person, hates that person. Like he’s out to get people. I have a different perception of our wonderful Jehovah. As the angel that said to Moses when Jehovah’s palm was protecting him from the brightness, “Jehovah, Jehovah, a God merciful & gracious, abundant in loving kindness.” We humans don’t fully grasp the scope of Jehovah’s love for humanity. You can get the brothers to have an apostasy tribunal with me & I will not take that thought back, no matter the threats I will receive. So I’m in your hands. Do as you wish. All will be revealed in due time my father. Be reasonable. May his kingdom come, & may we be found unblemished in God’s eyes. Peace be upon you always. May the Lord add his blessings always as he has added his blessings to my life and brought me to JOY/PEACE/FAITH.
Love forever,
………..(Me)
Dundee, I have not reread your entire letter to your father and I appreciate your responding to your father.
One item If I might make a suggestion is not to meet with them. No one should have that type of power over you. The elders are just men sitting in a position of judging you. Many wish they had never gotten disfellowshiped but just walked away. Ask any number of people. If you have left them, why sit in a judicial meeting with them. Some of the elders even would not come after you to DF because you have left already. It will be another point for your father.
Just a loving suggestion to speak to your father but not go to a judicial committee.
My dear Sister,
I would never EVER again sit b4 one after the experience I had. I’m just boldly standing up 2 my dad, making the point that I will not recant my beliefs. That he needs to realize that. The elders at this point won’t even bother with me. They also wonder if I might pursue a court case against them if they were to slander me before the congregation. So they would be freightened to even try. My father will not do anything except tell his close friends & it will travel here. My father has no credibility in the cong anymore cause of his scandle he caused yrs ago in the circuit. The only thing I can see is what the elder book states. Save the accusations for when the inactive publisher returns then address all accusations & punish at that point. But I won’t return. And they realize that at this point.
Great, just thought I would refresh your memory. Make sure you post your father’s reply on here. Hopefully you will reach him. Does he know you are with the Bible Students? Since they are mentioning the Bible Students every week it might be a talking point. We pray this turns out as a blessing for you and your courage is to be commended. They didn’t beat you down. BTW, give your mother our love, please.
All my father realizes at this time is that I may be isolating myself from the cong. Our last phone conversation I was mentioning how a brother was heading toward molesting my daughter, & i rescued her! One of the elders physical abuse. Another accusing me of apostasy just to get even with me cause he was withholding the knowledge to my cong.that my ex wife committed adultery.I having a car accident & the elders not caring, my mom falling & her face was black, but the elders & their wives feel it more important to put time in service than call or visit my mother. That my little boy almost died from surgery to a severe mold issue in one kingdom hall & the brothers attacking our family. My son couldn’t breath on the operating table & the hospital had to administer treatments. I referred to my boy as the sacrificial lamb that almost was in that instant. And a few other things. He told me its perceived that this happened & is not true, that I’m making it all up.That was in January. In February I met the Bible Students. So he doesn’t quite know I’ve went back to my roots & searched b4 the JW’s got their start. Though as you can feel from his letter, his antenna is up, asking me who i’m keeping company with. He senses something. I should get a reply within 2 weeks cause he needs time to conspire with the demon inside him that makes him so cynical, pessimistic, & critical. He needs new shocking phrases to write to manipulate FEAR, SHAME, & whatever other crafty machination of our Adversary. Yes I will post his reply as soon as i receive it for all to see & feel my experience.
Dundee, amazing how the stories are different yet the same. Elder abuses. Got to go knock on doors, get in their time, rather than help a brother, sister or a child. They bring in these numbers because some go right out the back door.
The mold problem should have been addressed by health authorities or leave as you did.
Adultery, well that is what witnesses do, that is quite the norm. Requiring evidence to be free is not up to them, even they will tell you it is between you and God.
What you are experiencing are the different stages of grief. A death of who you were, your religion, has died before your eyes. Sorrow , mourning and now you are angry. Sorry to say Grief’s stages can’t be jumped over but you can modify it. You have us so we hope that is a modifier for you. We will see you thru as will your ecclesia.
In my case, the witnesses saying they are the Bible Students and we are the Bible Students have confused the issue and made my life sweeter. My family and friends are corn-fused! So telling him might present questions you can answer to win your father or at least cause corn-fusion.
Remember one thing in your favor is witnesses can’t think for themselves and the governing body has not addressed the issue of two sets of Bible Students. So he might drop the evil speaking and ask questions. Witnesses generally can’t defend their beliefs if it isn’t written somewhere.
But of course you have to reveal this when you are ready.
Recently an older sister in the Kingdom Hall passed away.I used to adore her while growing up.Because of diabetes she would give me,a young boy @the time,her desserts wen we’d hav hot lunchs during assemblies.Who, as a kid, wood not enjoy that??Well wen I was going thru a horrible divorce,&my ex wife seemed2be bribing the elders with favors or expensive edible arrangemt fruit baskets,she was taking sides with my ex without even knowing she was the 1 committing adultery,stealing from my family jewels & convincing my old grandparent wen I was at work to sign over monies, etc..this sister would spread horrible slander about me not only in the hall I was in but thru other halls.i found out from 1 M.S. & 1 Elder in different congregations.i sed 2 them….I wish u wouldnt of told me that,cause that breaks my heart!well,she recently died.i dont rejoice over my sisters death but I only am grateful her slander has finally stopped for over 4yrs she was doing it to me.I pray the Lord shows her mercy wen she is brought back into the Kingdom.I wanted so desperately to defed myself to her,however I kept my mouth shut & let her slander.I figured it wood not go on indefinitely…I’m grateful Jehovah heard my pleas for it to stop while I was enduring thru it.Now there is more peace as she was a primary mouth piece of being a gossiper & slanderer in my life.I’m grateful our Father is a merciful God with ALL of us & our various imperfections.
Yesterday I provided a business service to her surviving son & daughter in law. These individuals are among the beautiful personalities in the jw world. I arrived 9:30am. Looking beyond the wife being in control of the husband, telling him to shut up cause she didn’t understand why i needed to come into the home to provide this service that is an indoor service, because she was in a bad mood trying to get the home ready for some bethelites the next day.Looking past her telling him what to do constantly, telling him where to step, how to move a piece of furniture, how to move an area rug better, how to hang a clock over the fireplace cause he wasn’t putting in the hooks as quick as she’d like, how to paint around the walls that had marks, how to bend, how to move outside furniture, how to stand, how to sit, how to eat lunch & the ALL day treating him as he is inferior, yet he makes a ton of money & is the primary breadwinner. I had a chance to talk with her & she told me her horrible experience with her deceased mother in law. How she too faced a manipulative woman who turned many in the cong.against them by spreading lies. We compared stories. She told me how I’m a true JW & have always been.But that we have a magnet attracting the worst ones to us.She told me the experiences with the very elders wives that also as their husbands, only listen to one side of the story & will discipline based on hearsay. She had her husband buy me lunch & he prayed over the meal beautifully about the good association we’re sharing over the meal. Enjoyed sitting & eating with them. Even though she’s high strung, looking beyond that nervous energy, she is like taking on the roll of his dead mother, overly caring for his every move.Wanting him to move perfect so he doesn’t injure himself. By the time I was done working for them they both praised my honesty, my kind demeaner & how they will hire me back every year. At the end of the day, I was both frustrated at how she treated her husband, but then was happy cause after my discount they tipped me very well! Overall I’m happy I worked for them yesterday. They trusted me moving through the private areas of their house so I can finish the days work, & kept praising me continually to make me feel good. They seemed so troubled how I was treated in the congregation & it appeared as if they wanted to make up for it somehow by giving me extra money & speaking kind healing words.
Dundee thanks so much for sharing your experience. What an uplifting experience. They saw you for what you are and become when you are on your own to think and just do good and your best because you have a personal responsibility to God himself to be decent. I hope they heal and enjoy their company. It is so stressful when you have visitors coming not in family so she was probably nervous and he knows her so well. He is the stronger and could take her pushiness.lol. At least when company is gone they will have everything in place.
My name is ari Matthew Davies I’m 53 years old now.its been some 24 years now since Jehovah god delivered me from drug addiction and started my new life as a plain simple Christian believer. My previous life as a Jehovah’s wittness was living hell! I endured childhood abuse and was baptised to prevent my destruction when armsgedon came in 1975. I did not enjoy the door to door preaching work I felt like I was lieing to people. Now its 2014 I don’t door knock! But when I talk to people about Jesus. I can tell an honest and true story about how the living god Jehovah saved my very life through the kindness Jesus and his followers on earth showed to me…
I won’t take a bunch of time calling to mind the faults of the Jehovah’s witness group! I will instead testify that Jesus Christ not organizations is were you must turn! And when Jesus changes everything you were. Then you also can give an honest and true personal testament .instead of a magazine script.more like the telemarketing nobody likes.
Arimatthewdavies, my friend so nice hear from you again. Ari you are fighting the fine fight and you are winning. So many on the streets are victims of abuse by the witnesses. A TV station is doing a documentary on that.
Your sincerity and love for God and Jesus comes from your heart and it so nice to hear from you.
Do you see the info for the General Convention posted? Come on if you can starting Saturday thru Thursday. Br. Peter has a part and you will recognize me as I wave to the camera all the time.
Take Care and if you have trouble getting on come to the site and someone will help you. Take Care my brother and May God Bless you as you fight the fight. Jacqueline
May the Lord add more of His blessings on you. Thank you for fighting the fine fight!
To Dundee, Hi there, I am fairly new to this site but I just wanted to tell you how very sorry I am to read of all your terrible ordeals, it disgusts me that people who claim to follow Christ & live by Jehovah’s standards can behave in such a sickening cruel manner. I really feel for you I am so glad you are out of it & found comfort with the bible students. Don’t ever under-estimate yourself or let anyone else make you feel worthless like they did at our last congregation because you held your head up high & always tried to do the right thing even through you had all that persecution you had to endure. May Jehovah bless you & keep you safe.
I know how it feels not to fit in as Jw, they prevented me from getting baptized even though I answered all their baptizm questions correctly & I had been studying on & off for 18 years due to the fact that we moved home a few times. Then judgements upon me started by some of the elders, all to do with how I look & what I did for a living. I agued the point that they had no right to tell me I cannot get baptized for it is a personal dedication to Jesus Christ & Jehovah God but they still would not allow it. I became very disheartened & depressed, I felt worthless but I couldn’t let it lay. I became an angry man which lead me telling them that they should not be passing judgement upon me, only Jehovah & Jesus have the right do that. I searched the scriptures & found nothing to back up their decision, then I learned that when they baptize you it is into the organization & not soley into Christ, this bothered me greatly. Again I apporoached them after researching it & finding that an older watchtower from June-July 1955 stated that no-one should get baptized into the one emersing you, not in anyone’s name & not into any organization, what a contridiction! I brought this up but all I got as a response was that it makes sense to be baptized into God’s organization as he is an organized God. Since then I have started questioning certain other teachings & rules that didn’t sit right with me, quickly contact from ones I thought were friends in the organization started to cease. It has not just affected me by my whole family too as my wife has lost a couple of sisters who she thought were close friends & really looked up to them as they were also her study conductors, my eldest son who is a young teenager at school has also been affected & it’s been very confusing for him. There is a whole lot more to my story but I will save that for another time.
I just wanted to let you know that I genuinely feel for you & your children & I am sure many on here do too, I just wanted to wish you all the very best on your new journey. I am so glad you have found your way!
Daz…thank u so much for your encouraging words. I find that interesting they wouldnt let u b baptized.Who prevented the Ethiopian Eunich from getting baptized? No one.Did he have to go over a ton of questions to indocrinate him into an org? Nope.Just an explanation & then baptism.Man has to complicate things & twist their explanations,trying to control others.
Yes & the type of friends your wife had are called conditional friendships. Friendships based on conditions…meetings,service time,etc.Those r not real friends. My own father will not speak to me or his grandkids cause of how unsafe for us to be in attendance in a kingdom hall. For that he throws us away. I didnt ask to have these experiences but had to go thru them to eventually get UNPLUGGED from the matrix. My brother….I know u r only mentioning a small percentage of the story u went thru.The same with me. We can write novels..
Hey no thanks needed Dundee, thankyou for reply & your understanding, yes I bet we could write novels my friend. I have a good friend who isn’t a witness & wasn’t religious & he would never dream of treating me in such away, in 10 years we have never has a fall out or crossed words, we are like bros. I have been slowly introducing him to Jehovah God & Jesus, I have explaining about why certain world events happen & how they are connected to bible, he has started to believe which for me is such a joy!
Very true about Ethiopian Eunich & everyone else that the apostles baptized, it’s enough that you want to dedicate our life to Jehovah & Jesus & try your best to walk in their ways. There shouldn’t be ANY additional questions from a third party/organization run by men.
Take care my friend.
Daz…how long hav u been in assoc.withe the B.Students? For me it’s been less than a half year.
Do u remember wen jws sed we shouldn’t say someone in the world is nicer than the jws? The thing is…There r many that are kinder & would never dream of hurting u.But with jws it’s like many lie awake at nite finding a way to destroy our faith.
Hi Dundee, thanks for your reply:
I have only really learned about the Bible Sudents since joining this site. I have already contacted the Dawn Bible Students in the UK & have had a reply from one of them so I am hoping to meet up with some who aren’t to far from me.
Yes I know a few non witnesses who are lovely kind hearted people. Although I have had quite a few bad experiences regarding Jw’s I cannot say that that they are all bad as I have studied with two married couples in the past who were just such lovely genuine people. They were very honest hearted & could tell they really did have a deep love for Jehovah & Jesus so with respect to these ones I cannot tar them all with the same brush. We became very fond of these ones, both couples older Jw’s in their 60’s & it was these for us that set the example. Sadly as we moved on & moved to a few different areas but when we finally settled & set up home we studied again & joined the local Kingdom halL. After about a year we began to see & hear things that made us uncomfortable. Some of the teachings & certain rules I just seemed to have difficulty abiding to however hard I tried.
I have to admit though, due to all the studying I did it has helped build me into who I am today but I was never controlled or under any illusions, I was always questioning things which after a while started irritating certain ones because most of the time the answers they gave just didn’t cut it for me. I felt that some of the Elders seemed like they thought they had some sort of power or hold over you but not me, although I respected them I also made it clear that I am who I am & the changes that I had already made from within & outward should have been enough but unfortunately NO it was not as I explained in a previous post.
Nobody has the right to tell you whether YOU have a relationship with Jehovah! How dare they assume that you haven’t, I knew from my early days of studying that I had developed a relationship with my heavenly father & his son Jesus. The elders could not know this as it’s personal & private to me. When I would say that I do have that relationship they acted like they didn’t believe me. Well they were & are wrong, I feel have been guided here.
It started when I met a visiting brother but no-one knew he was a brother as he didn’t tell anyone. He had had issues with elders from his congregation for years, they mistreated him badly. He has a friend that lives quite near to us so when he would come down here to visit his friend he would go to the meetings at my local Kingom Hall but always wore casual smart wear, no suit & tie. He was automatically judged by some by just what he wore. He is a very private guy, he told me he was drawn to me when he first saw me, he described like a subtle wind blowing him towards me. He knew that there was issues with me in there even though he hadn’t even spoke to me at that point. I had been feeling very down as just couldn’t make progress in the “truth” due to being held back by certain Elders. Anyway to cut a long story short, this brother had been through similar things to me in the organization, even though he was baptized & been a Jw for approx 20 years. We have become good friends & he has been a pillar of strength to me & he says I have helped him too which gave me alot of joy to hear that. He is the one that really kicked started my search again for the TRUTH.
I believe because of him & my constant heartfelt prayer & intense researching I have been lead here. This site has helped me so much in such a short space of time, especially Jacqueline, she is such a sincere upliftig & caring lady. There is so much information on here & you can discuss any issues or opinions without judgement. I really hope the the Dawn Bible Students near me will let me join their group. All I want is to do right by Jehovah & Jesus & share the good new with my friends & people I meet, this was something that the Elders let me have a little taste of then took it away from me, well they thought they had but all they really did was push me away a little more & gave me more of reason to search for the Truth once again.
Daz…I pray that your 1st contact will bring even MORE joy than me. My 1st contact was the ultimate joy in my heart! I miss ALL the wonderful JW’s that passed away. Sometimes I wondered if they all were alive & in one hall & among the elder arrangement, I may not have ever left. But they are gone for now. They will return in the Kingdom, & they will be true disciples forever.
My elders too think that I’m spiritually weak.Yes that is a personal relationship with Jehovah. No one can judge that. My heart thirsts for Biblical Knowledge,Understanding,Insight,Discernment, & Wisdom as yours does. I used to listen in elders meetings a judgemnt about the persons return visits being low. Yet they’re at all the meetings, giving encouraging comments, but wasn’t enough so were labeled weak. I had put in over 40 Return Visits(RV’s)when pioneering & an elder chastized me for not doing enough door to door. But I put in the required hours & then some, & a ton of RV’s.I inquired how he would know that when I am out in service at times he is not and was doing door to door. He said there is a way to figure it out.I said try that on another member, please don’t make assumptions.So then he went on to say that I must be a sinner because when he works with me he has no success in the ministry, but that when he works apart from me he does great. I said I wasn’t aware that I made any sins this day, and gasped a sigh like I’ve had enough. Then I couldn’t speak right at the next door & would be counseled that I should of done better but how can one focus properly when being under burning missiles aimed at their hearts? Then if I didn’t place much magazines the elders would counsel me on that too. When man puts inforce man made rules they examine under a microscope. Now I don’t turn in time, however I’ve been having more opportunities to speak about the Kingdom than when a jw, that it is a lot! They’ll label me irregular or inactive, but yet I preach always. Funny thing I can’t tell you how many times I’d put time in & the bro.would mark down 0, finding that out later. Very disturbing. At times when I’d ask for my publisher record card, the elder would refuse to show me, so I knew my time was manipulated.Thankfully we are wholesouled as to Jehovah & not to men.Col 3:23.
BTW…hold onto that good friend. I like his way of thinking..lol
I know in my heart that the Bible Students are a right way to Jehovah. I’ll tell you something personal. My prayers are deep.Jehovah knows sometimes that I need to see certain things to be assured of something.. So I asked him to please let me know who has the Truth, if it is JW then please have an elder or an elders wife in JW send me a card, and even write something in their about an injury I suffered, that the cong. would not acknowledge, a bad accident. And if B.S.were “The Way” then show me somehow so that I can understand. On that very day, because i looked at the postmark on the envelope, a B.S. elders wife sent me a card, was hoping I felt better from my physical injuries, & sent me the most beautiful scriptures. There was MY ANSWER…I knew Jehovah told ME that Bible Students are an acceptable way to worship our Heavenly Father. And guess what??? My prayer was silent….no one heard but Jehovah. That’s why i….just like you, believe we were led here to the Truth.
Hi friends,
you said :
“That’s why i….just like you, believe we were led here to the Truth.”
As I am one who love God and his son Jesus, I want to say that the association with Bible Students is a good one … yet “the Truth” is “Jesus Christ”
He is the Way, the Truth and the Life …
and Jesus’ command (Matt 6:33) “seek ye first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness” has a new and deeper meaning for us now, after being made free from human organization bounds/chains!
it is right to obey Jesus Christ because this is the will of our Heavenly Father:
“This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased;
hear ye him.”
friendly, rus v.
Yes Thank You Rus Virgil…..Jesus Christ is the way, the Truth and the Life..That’s more appropriate what you just shared from Scripture.Forgive my imperfect words. My heart meant what you just shared. What I should of said is that the Bible Students led me or pointed me to Jesus Christ the way, the Truth & the Life. They showed me from Scripture those exact words that you just reminded me of. Thank you for that more appropriate way to express this.
Rus – Thanks. Very nice thoughts. We love you.
Hi Dundee, thankyou very much for your reply, I am so very glad that you have found where you belong & know that you are walking with Christ & Jehovah. Thankyou for your kind words also, I am very much looking forward to meeting with some Bible students in the very near future.
I hatr the fact that you were so disrespected & treated so unfairly by those elders but these kind of trials will & do make us stronger & push even more into the arms of Jehovah God.
Yes Daz…I agree. All these harsh experiences have been an enlightenment process 4 me personally. What duznt kill u makes u stronger. I thank Jehovah always 4 delivering me out alive & that i still want to worship God.The admin.of this site alerted me that many get so bitter that they become athiest or agnostic.But I felt Jehovahs Holy Spirit amidst the adversity. Scriptures mean so much more 2 me now.I saw him setting things in motion.I didn’t understand always why.But I would always take to heart the scriptures..
“Do not be afraid, for I am with u.
Do not be anxious, for I am your God
I will fortify you, yes, I will help u
I will really hold on to u with my right hand of righteousness.”
ISAIAH 41:10 NOT
“Trust in Jehovah with all your heart, And do not rely on your own understanding.
In all your ways take notice of him, And he will make your paths straight.
It will be a healing to your body
And refreshment for your bones.”
Proverbs 3:5,6,8
…”God is faithful, and he will not let u be tempted beyond what u can bear, but along with the temptation he will also make the way out so that u may be able to endure it.”
1Corinthians10:13
NOT I meant NWT New world Translation revised adition
COULD YOU LIST THOSE KINGDOM HALLS, SO NO ONE GOES TO THEM?
If I wasnt concerned of their methods of retaliation against me & my family, I most certainly would list them. For my safety I cannot at this time.However you can discern different individuals motives by how they treat u, even as high up as the elders & above.Particularly in the back room wen the door is closed & there are no eyewitnesses. Always show them respect but at the same time u have to protect yourself. Look for signs of abusive behavior & steer clear of that.
Anonymous – Listing the Kingdom Halls could possibly identify Dundee to the elders there and bring disciplinary measures. Sometimes you just can’t get too specific.
Anonymous, I just read all of Dundee’s response. You ask him to list the congregation. I will tell you where they are. Look in any phone book in the world or on the internet. Write the watchtower society for their list of congregations. His statements are almost text book descriptions of what happens with those gestapo like men in position in the congregations of Jehovah witnesses worldwide.
I am guessing but 80 percent of witnesses would add to his testimony. Only someone from another religion would doubt this testimony as their preachers would be voted out by the church.
Dundee I am a woman an experienced some of the things you did and you can pay your way out of everything in the witnesses.
I paid my boys way and let CO stay in my house, pay their airfare and gave lots of money to Bethelites so my children would not be mistreated.
It is a cancer that has cells in mostly all of the congregations of the so called Jehovah witnesses. This hurts to see his experience and know every word is typical.
If Erika on this site told you what happenned to her mom you would not believe it but we witnessed it along with at least one more person on this site for years.
Yes Jacqueline I read Erika’s experience. I feel badly what happened to her mother. My mom was marked during a local needs part due to 1 elder & CO coming over & the battery died in the doorbell.Without asking her why she didnt come to the door on their surprise visit they decided to humiliate her from the platform. I can empathize with Erika.
Jacqueline- I recently resigned as an Elder after 12 yrs, served on a couple different body’s and seen what you speak of but I was on 1 particular body this was not true of. I never acted as a Gestapo and neither did those 4 other brothers I served with.. As a body we tried our best to reflect Jehovah’s main attribute that being love. I have experienced the other side and seen it my self but through experience I know better than say all. Sister resentment can be a dangerous thing to your own spirituality! A damning attitude is what a lot of indiduals come here to get away from.
Brettstone – Thanks. I appreciate that you were a part of a JW Elder body that put such a focus on Jehovah’s love. Br. David Stein had mixed experiences like you and spoke of some loving JW brethren he had met with. I am sure that whenever a JW congregation has loving elder’s that it is a great blessing to all the members.
Some JWs have had bitter experiences, so it can be difficult for them to try to always project a positive attitude.
Brettstone I agree it is not all elders, I have at least 3 fleshly brothers that would die for one of the flock and in my territory individual elders and bodies. As an organizational body I feel however they do the work of the company to keep their position. No matter how some personally feel they remain silent. I broke down once when a girl told me what really happened to her in a pedophile, rape miscarriage of bay case at 12 years.I was involved with her emotional care. 8 elders remained silent to the hospital and me and when I found out years later I asked a very loving elder: How could you remain silent and leave this man with book study in his home and 4 other pedophiles in our young congregation teeming with children. Many are afraid to speak.
Israel often came under community responsibility if they didn’t take action or permitted Molech and idol worship.
So that is why O sweep with a broad brush. Men in power (ministers) during the civil rights movement showed that you must not remain silent in the face of injustice. White ministers, Black ministers took a stand against the oppression rather than support it, giving up life and job. Most elders have been scared of losing their “POWER AND POSITION”.
If you are a part of a rotten piece of meat your non infection keeps it alive until it spreads. Cut away as you did and it will die.
I love my brothers but they are a part of something rotten. All these experiences on here and the millions others are testimony to this.
Brettstone thank you for the caution to guard my heart, I will pray over that. It just hurts Brettstone. When I wrote that I had just come from the home of witnesses and saw 5 victims, children and the look in their eyes hurts. The law of the land however came as a river to help them and yes they are children of witnesses.
This convention and association will be good for me and all the brothers as we get together.
I don’t mean to damn the elders but so many on here need to tell the story as it is therapeutic and others are helped knowing they aren’t imagining this.
Strange website isn’t it. People can talk here. An Investigative TV show reads some of the cases here to get a feel of what is happening.
And some comments we can’t print, the audience see only replies and not what was said especially the peodophile testimony. So many said it and are now healing.
Hope to see you online. Take Care my dear Brother and I will take to heart your council.
Well said Sr.Jacqueline. I have seen certain wonderful elders in JW that wood literally take a bullet 4 me in the past. I’m sure Brettstone & some of the others are such men as that. I treasure individuals of their sort as i was 1 of those rare breeds that demonstrated Christlike love wen i was a shepherd too.They seem few and far between.I will never forget those ones I crossed paths with in life throughout the years.Its qualities that have been lacking in many I witnessed also that wood keep silent when it was important to speak up.But I treasured the ones that courageously did try their hardest to act beautifully. And I too can benefit from Brettstones counsel to let go of sum resentment.My heart aches in pain the things I eyewitnessed but also is a healing to know kind hearted elders do still exist in different localities.
Brettstone – Thanks again for your comments. Jacqueline will be tied up for a few hours but will respond to you when she gets a chance.
Brettstone I have arrived at the convention. I want to first say I am sorry if I offended you. I consider you a friend and have respect for your courage and the questions your way of starting off your discussion last week. Our numbers went up considerably as Br. Peter was able to impart answer to questions that many witnesses would have asked. Thank you.
Concerning my statement of using the term Gestapo, they as all know were the secret police in Germany and noted for their interrogation methods. They obeyed without questioning their superiors.
The organization has a certain method in the way they interrogate in their judicial committes and most elders obey the flock book without question and the good ones will generally stand by and let it happen. That is what I was trying to say.
There are some very fine men doing the best they can without losing their position. I would call on them in a crisis as I had to do earlier this year.
A witness called from almost 1,000 miles away and was about to commit suicide and murder of the child with her and she was desperate and had a weapon. In suicide prevention classes you are trained to listen to the sounds around the caller to locate them and call the best person first. I called the elders first as I think it would have ended badly with the police. I never met these brothers and told them the supermarket chain and I said I hear a clock gonging. They were there in minutes as they knew this was Clock tower. They guided that person in and was with the family until the wee hours of the night. These men averted a terrible situation. So I don’t have hatred in my heart for JW elders, it is just most will employ unmerciful tactics without blinking and laugh at friends and do pay back. These are experiences I know and have some recorded judicial meetings. The internet is consistent on the rules of conduct of the majority.
And then you come across men like you and your body. The Kingdom Hall normally gets very overcrowded when there are Godly men presiding in a fine way and I am glad to hear about it. We welcome you.
Please forgive me for being insensitive and I meant no harm in speaking what I felt validated our posters comments. In Christian love, Jacqueline
My parents were of Jewish Background. Before I was born, their son died before 2 years old. This left a devistation in their hearts. Eventually JW’s showed up at the door sharing the Scriptural Resurrection hope.Soon Mom, dad, & even dad’s parents got baptized. Eventually they decided to try for another child & there i came into the world. Dad advanced very quickly to being an elder while Mom would Auxiliary Pioneer several times a year with me. Eventually Dad became the Presiding Overseer(Now known as The Coordinator of the Body of Elders)& for the most part he kept the congregation in order, organized & kept busy in the Lord’s Work. However he devoted most of his time to this cause while neglecting the needs of mom & I. He was very harsh! Would beat me senseless many times until mom would beg him to stop. The pain was unbearable! I would listen with my ear against the wall while he was repremanding different brothers on the phone. He would talk down to them & was very manipulating.There wasn’t anything anyone could do bout it. I was too afraid of his temper for certain! Eventually he had a best friend in the congregation & decided to have an affair with the wife of his best friend. I was in my 20’s. His best friend was going to commit suicide until I stepped in & persuaded him to leave this in Jehovah’s hands. But this didn’t stop him from going down a path of alcohol & other things to comfort himself. My dad was disfellowshipped along with his mistress, & they fled to another state.She was out about 2years & he was out for less than 4. The innocent husband that fell to drinking was disfellowshipped for many many years before he would come back with another woman. Rumor has it that she suffocated him & plays the victim. He called me before his untimely death saying goodbye& that he loved me.For a man to say that to another man, something was odd I thought. He called his daughter & sed he’s scared that his wife is angry with him that they just had a fight.He was very sick & just came out a hospital.Sure enough the next day found dead in bed. His wife manipulates the elders to do whatever she wants. Or to think the way she says to think.
As I’ve been caring for my mom, I was a Ministerial Servant. Eventually gotten married. Moved to a new congregation. Certain elders were extremely abusive & vindictive.My 1st meeting after the honeymoon, the secretary took me in the back room, locked the door & closed the curtains & accused me of being a spy. Proceeded to interrigate me alone. All this cause he asked me to give him the names & #’s of the Presiding Overseer & Secretary in my former congregation.I did, but he accidently gave me his work # & I left the info with his secretary.He sed that he works for a manicipality & everything is on public record,that if the great tribulation were to strike now that they will know he is a JW & he will hold me responsible when he gets fired. I was shaking inside by the time he was done with me. They wouldn’t reappoint me a M.S. due to him & at the last minute of walking up to the platform to deliver an assignment they would take it away from me & give it to an elder to do in my place. All my effort, my prayers,my preperations,my taking off from work, just taken away like that due to this vindictive elder. I cannot tell you how many times they threatened me with disfellowshipping for whatever I did. Weekly elders meetings with me until I would get cancer.(of which i beat thru natural medicine)A friend was having a seperation & they forbidded me with working with him in service or else. At this point they had let me be an M.S. again, but would use that to their advantage threatening to take it away. The P.O.would threaten to punch me in the face until he had to go for open heart surgery. Another replaced him worse constantly harass the children during the WT conducting. Telling them from the stage that they are not allowed to comment,that this info is not for them. Or he would call the sisters hookers & all sorts of other ungodly expressions.My mom went in for hip surgery & due to my caring for her when she was crippled, it was an object of an elders meeting with me. They tried to force me to step down or else threaten to remove me.OF which I would always show them the utmost respect & answer them mildly & remind them that this is my mother & how inappropriate it would be to let her just “rot”. This while her own congregation would not even care for moms needs.I needed help from the HLC Hospital Liason Committee, due to moms blood count dropping,I called my elders & they refused to give me the number cause mom wasn’t in our congregation. The list is endless of abuses. So I prayed along with my wife for a release from this persecution from the elder body. I asked Jehovah to let a talk be given of which they would encourage all to go to the cong.of their residence, as we were outside the territory.Then I asked God to have the speaker talk to me after the talk.Sure enough all happened & I moved out.
They immediately transferred my M.S. responsibility to the new hall & made me an elder.As soon as I became an elder my eyes opened up to what goes on behind the scenes.The elders would argue viciously, & loudly. Then they would attack me. I was speachless. They would make fun of the friends & even talk about the sex lives of the friends. Judge one another. Be quick to disfellowship without investigating all the facts, bear false testimony, straight out Lie!!I wasn’t sure if this happened in all the kingdom halls but this certainly was happening here where i was.They encouraged me to read the files on many of the members. It listed sins of which elders had committed & the regular friends. Private matters for all new elders & present elders to read over & over.Things from 30 years ago or more.Huge sealed envelopes on judicial committee cases the elders would handle. I was told that the friends are having sex with animals. They were slow at allowing disfellowshipped ones to be reinstated back into the organization. There was a black mold issue in the kingdom hall & my child was getting ill.The brothers threatened me to keep silent.My child had to go in for surgery & almost died from it. Gotten a hernia from coughing, then complications from the anesthesia, couldn’t breath when reviving afterwards. I was threatened more. Then I felt my wife was cheating on me. My children were growing up.The elders demanding I spend no time with them while giving me assignment after assignment with no rest.I begged them to lay off me.It got to a point my son is bleeding & I have to choose either to study for a part or to attend to the wound.They would make fun of the sinners in the back room. I was the elder who showed love & compassion when a person committed immorality,trying to readjust while the other two would make the individual feel worthless.They would say how they are Jehovah & they will die. Breaking the persons will to even live.Then they’d argue with me afterwards & tell me to be proud that I’m an elder, & to show my authority to these weak friends. I refused to give up my humility & compassion for the flock. I decided to step down. I knew this would lead to divorce as my wife basked in the glory of my position. This led to a depression in my heart. One day I uncovered phone records of her speaking continuously to another man, & even found her email account still open. The elders refused to look at the discovery. She bribed them with exprensive $70 fruit baskets,was best friends with their wives, & did things for their mothers. She told them I hated their particular race, that I slept with multiple women, & all sorts of stuff that I never did. They made fun of my sex life saying something of which I responded to them that it was none of their business & they immediately sed “Ah Ha!!!!!!! We got him brothers..do you agree?”They all said yes.They said that I can appeal a disfellowshipping decision but they would make sure the appeal committee would uphold their decision & that if I do appeal they would keep me out indefinitely. One of the elders was even guilty of physical abuse of hitting me a couple times. Another said I worship the devil,& the other said that King David was a better man than I will ever amount to be in life, that I am worthless & never belonged as a Jehovah’s Witness.That all my activities are worthless.So I walked out in tears & absolutely broken! Two other elders expressed remorse for how I was treated even said after 2 months I should write a reinstatement plea.That they are in disagreement with the decision but that I have the deck stacked against me. After a few months I left for another hall.
The new hall seemed nice.It was refreshing not to see all the others. I wrote reinstatement pleas while they were ignored.The answer always was either silence or they were going to go on vacation.I would look at these brothers & ask if that appears odd?? All the while showing restraint & respect for them. Eventually they forced the other cong.to meet with me.My ex wife had been privately reproved, it being kept a secret her adultery, her theft at work, her phone sex, her abandoning the family several times, her fraud uncovered through court discovery. I was Df’d for lessor infractions of their laws. Played the lottery for one month cause she said she would leave me with our children if I couldn’t find a way to come into some extra money.She did something wen we were dating & I kept it hidden for fear she would leave me & I already bought a ring for her. Stupid things like that.Wish I could change that,but I bore guilt.I confessed while she kept things hidden for fear.Only confessed what she felt necessary. I met with my brothers, then met with the original cong. They kept reviling me for 50 minutes, then I respectfully interrupted them & words flowed out of my heart, I don’t even remember what I said, but the holy spirit supplied the words,they kept reprimanding & judging & putting me out in the hallway,I heard them arguing with one another, then finally said I’m a righteous man & forgiven & sed the announcement will be made on Monday.And that even though I’d be reinstated, I am not allowed to talk to my parents or any in the congregation of where i was attending. More manmade rules.
Reinstatement brought happiness, though the original brothers would ignore me & viciously get even cause I got them in trouble with some circuit overseers.They were withholding a scriptural freedom letter cause my wife committed adultery.If I were to get involved with anyone I would have announcements of discipline from the platform about me without that letter.It took forever & much certified receipt requested priority mailings. They started accusing me of apostasy to my brothers cause the friends ask questions & I give my reply which exposes their fraudelent behavior. But they wanted me to be kicked out for apostasy with no proof & they were unwilling to hold a formal meeting with me where I can face my accusers.
A brother in a local cong was a secret pedophile. He set sights on my family.I protected my kids.He launched an attack. I wrote to the present Governing Body & they ignored me, no response. My family was even slightly poisoned. We recovered thru charcoal & bentanite clay capsules absorbing the toxins. When going to assemblies he blocks my entrance to my seat.He’s admitted murder.My donations are responded to with a beautiful letter from the Watch Tower, but this letter of begging them for help goes by the wayside.My elders told me that the letter was received, that they will watch the door.That was it so I knew the WT received it.
The School Overseer refuses to give my child a talk on the Theocratic Ministry School while other parents make fun of my kids that they do nothing in the hall while theirs do more.The brothers won’t give me KM’s unless I argue, while they put their hands on my throat & choke me lightly,but you can tell they are mad. The new Bibles weren’t given to my children until I got the Coordinater to demand they receive each one.My children tell me that they are alive, that they breathe, why are the elders treating them this way they ask? Our Watchtower we have to fight to receive.
Long story short…I prayed about all this. I found this friends of JW website, JW leaks, & other places where I heard all sorts of horrible experiences my brothers & sisters went through. I learned of the Bible Students tracing them back b4 the JW’s.I was amazed! Purchased a bunch of literature from the Chicago Bible Students. Went for an emotional clearing with a special natural doctor that deals with emotions.Never stopped praying since. Sr.Jacqueline & Br.Peter from this website contacted me then put me in touch with a local congregation or Ecclesia.An elder & his wife came over & brought me comfort.They took me & my children to big gathering up north.We had a study of deep things in scripture.I was amazed. I couldn’t believe these people there were literally Christ-Like.I always asked Jehovah if the true disciples show love then why do the majority of JW lack that emotion, & are disconnected?? By their fruits we would recognize them. A good tree does not produce worthless fruit, & a rotten tree does not produce good fruit. I felt such a connection among these Bible Students. They literally pray for one another. And you can feel it. I’ve read Studies in The Scriptures Volume 1.I’m onto Volume 2. I’ve come home.This is where I belong. I’ve always felt being a square peg in a round hole in JW, but here in the Bible Students I fit perfectly! For my survival I know I will never set foot in the Kingdom Hall again. The spirit of fear & guilt can lead a person to end their existence. How can that be healthy? I’m grateful to the JW’s for keeping me focused on something higher, but they destroyed my family multiple times…
Dundee your last paragraph expresses my thoughts! I had a visit fromn the elders (JW) three weeks ago and I was bursting with joy. It rubbed off on one of them as he is just glad I forgave him for his part in signing a letter that was a lie, he is the 2nd of three that asked me to forgive them.
I am home now, like you it was a journey because we tried so hard to stick it out in what we felt was Jehovah’s way. But the distortion of this God presented was bordering on wicked. Now I am getting to know who Jehovah really is and realize under Christ” wing is the safe and only way to approach Jehovah and he is good.
Thanks for your testimony. I am sure thousands will say DITTO to your experience. LOVE among themselves is the identifying mark not knowledge but it helps. See you at the convention, maybe. In Him, Jacquelline
When hearing every other sentence like we must be apart of Gods Organization in order to hav a relationship with Jehovah & his son & that we must not think for ourselves,must not research anything not written by the WT,must not read the Bible apart from WT literature,must quit our jobs to go to the assemblies to make a statement if our boss said no,must quit college if we are attending,sell our house & downsize to an apartment if necessary to keep ones eye simple,dont question,accept what is said…..yikes! Manipulation/Mind Control!At the conventions they will bump & push you to meet a governing body member.When I wanted to shake his hand he wouldnt & looked at my son with disgust! I felt small.Every one says its just imperfections.The WT even says to ignore these things & not write them about it.& if you are abused
They force u to keep quiet or else face disciplinary action.Down south a brother was molested & threatened. They disfellowshipped him the victim.Told him he wanted it. Another down south I also met…the pioneers taught him homosexuality as they were practicing.He was kicked out the org & not helped or deprogrammed.He said he learned more how to be worldly among the brothers than from the outside world. These two are all screwed up now.
Dundee, To hear these things are confirmation, that is why we tell the story. Things you report are being said verbatim on so many sites. We all live in different ares and different countries even and the stories are the same. Astonishing! Some things can’t be mentioned in polite society. The congregations are basically very immoral because they raked in everything in 1975. Lots of these had no spiritual thoughts and came in to keep from dying at armageddon. I have had brothers tell me their study conductors told them they had their pick of women and they can’t divorce you. The society encouraged married elders to include single women in their family outings etc this caused a lot of problems and was like a green light.
Numbers are so deceiving, If you had a choice you would not pick most of the people in the org as associates. I believe one has to seek God and he also calls them, they are concious of their spiritual need.
The witnesess go out after the lonely, depressed and immoral and thru trickery and cunning they suck people in for numbers and money, contributions. There are males that will tell you they used sisters as Bait to get baptized.
Now with the internet any wanting, and are among the Concious Class can get free. Many however that are witnesses like it the way it is. The young people use it as a social club. Here they meet at conventions to plan huge gatherings that are held all over the states. So this appeals to some and it is their way of worship, like other religious groups.
Now that I know the truth about armageddon and the mediatorial phrase of the kingdom and understand the Ransom, I am okay with what they do. They will get a chance to know in millennium.
I feel calm and grateful knowing these aspects of the plan of God.
Jacqueline…I want to thank you for the advice you gave me when the elders were stalking me this year. I was in a state of panic inside! My poor mom deals with Bi-Polar attacks due to the stress of the elders & the regular friends. A Pioneer hit my mom in her bad shoulder with the thick Insight Book. They’re demanding in front of the other sisters to know what medication if any that I give my mom.Had to tell them it is none of their business & how can you ask me something so personal i would tell this other sister. The elders constantly would take me in the back room & close the door.When finished the friends would ask me what sin I did. That I better get my life together,yet I hadn’t done nothing,the elders wanted to embarrass me or put fear in me.When telling another elder that my son is not given talks on the school, the other elder would tell me its all in my head, then months go by & he still doesn’t receive talks & parents make fun if our kids are not active in this. So when the elders were coming over unnanounced at all different times it was horrifying!Had no privacy.They look in windows,They look around the property.Ask why I dont’ answer when my car is outside. Awkward!Uncomfortable!So you helped me with a set of words to say to them. Then they moved on to guilt trip & fearful text messages until they see they can’t bring me to guilt or fear anymore which frustrates them. They want to know if I was going to an international convention.I send a text with a pic of a dying grandparent, all I get back is that I’m going to miss out on 2,500 delegates from different countries are going to be there, with !!!!!!! exclamation marks. And I’m like my family member is dying,Please stop sending me insensitive guilt trip messages. My inbox is full. Have a nice time. Ugh Sr.Jacqueline!! But finally the elders have stopped. But I see the friends all over & they attack me.So I have to tell them to stop. One said stuff in front of my young child & almost got left back from the grades dropping.These adults don’t know how to show discretion particularly in front of children. It is a war zone here. I see them at work. Judge me cause I take care of an dying family member. I can never do enough for them. Well I pulled the plug on feeling worthless, & I feel ALIVE with the Bible Students!!!!!
Dundee – Thanks for teaching me these JW Elder strategies. I think I will practice on Jacqueline! …. LOL
Seriously – It is a joy to have you as a friend. Talking with you about your experience and various Bible verses has been uplifting to me. Especially to see how your adversity has spiritually strengthened you. You really do know how to put into action Jesus council to love your enemies.
Brother Peter,
I prayed to Jehovah, infact begged Him…please send me True Spiritual Shepherds to care for me!!!! That I was one, that I showed love to His flock, even my enemies within the fold. Not too long after, Sister Jacqueline after rubbing figurative oil on my wounds, had you call me. In speaking with you, and the elders in my local Ecclesia, Jehovah indeed sent me True Spiritual Shepherds in every sense of the word. I’m grateful for your friendship, & our spiritual discussions. Even how much you like Science Fiction!!!!
Dundee, I feel reproved also by your experiences. You are a good righteous man. I fought back, I took them to court, got a restraining order. When they would want to take me aside to talk about nothing or a rumor from workers on my having political leaders and religious leaders in my facility. We were respected and I had CO and DO come from out of town to come to our facility and one said the society told him to go until I got his back pain cleared.
I wouldn’t let them talk to me in private. I would speak in a semi raised tone and say the congregation needs to hear and be in on anything you have to say to me. I would boldly tell them what they were doing rong in regard to me and issue a cease and desist.
I realized this is a business, a corporation not religion and I dealt with them in that manner. I got everybody off myback when I said openly in the hall this is the way this is going to go down:
I will sue the watchtower society, This Kingdom Hall and every elder here individually. All of a sudden it stopped. Also my husband came from his country and told them not to even speak to me, every word had to pass thru him. He was German Jewish and had survive the Jewish persecution, they respected him for a minute. When his illness progressed and he returned to his country for treatment, I walked away.
He being a witness was opposed to my contacting the BS while he lived in the states and I concurred but jumped at the opportunity when he was no more.
But your attitude puts me to shame as I was right back at them with scriptural support and 3 elders would call on me even when my hand wasn’t up so I would say what the magazine was jumbling up.
I guess all of us in our own way did what we could to survive. A male has a lot to lose by fighting them.
I was an older female and had no positions or anything to lose.
I just learned very early with the pedophile cases in my files, they will back down if you go after them legally and affect their bottom line.
Our Wednesday night study is tonight and I leave for the convention a day early tomorrow so I might not see any comments for a while. Take Care and hope you can be at the convention or come on by adobe connect.
Dear Sr.Jacqueline,
What matters most now is that we BOTH got to worship Jehovah with another option that is safer emotionally & physically for us.You got here before me & for that I am a bit jealous.I could of saved a lot of heart ache! However, Jehovah saw for me that I needed more time within the organization so that I would know without doubt that I tried my very hardest to make it work. He also wanted me to serve with higher responsibilities so that he could use me to really help the flock.There were times that I helped some of the friends to also not commit suicide & for that reason I was grateful to be used by God in that way. Though my body was falling apart in the process.It is absolutely amazing, as you know yourself in your profession, that emotional trauma continuously will manifest itself in Physical Symptoms at some point.It can cause cancers, suicide, Bipolar attacks in some, hopelessness & despair, massive pains, back spasms, heart attacks, strokes, divorce, loss of work, migranes, lack of sleep, nightmares,to name just a few side effects. For you my sister, I can’t imagine the emotions that you as a woman went through in dealing with insensitive individuals. But I do know what it feels like as a man with responsibilities. It is a trauma where fear, panic, adreniline surges throughout our bodies. We all react in different ways. I must say my sister you are definitely very spirited! Note to self, no one should ever mess with Sr.Jacqueline.LOL Bottom line, your reaction was for your self preservation, your survival. I’m certain if you took a passive approach you would of been disfellowshipped. You were protecting yourself legally from that outcome. For me, I made a decision to submit to their attacks & carry out their mocking me, picking on me, stripping me of dignity, watched them twist scripture to confuse my weakened emotional state(I was on a medication for fibromyalgia that caused a temporary emotional depression that made me briefly paralized in a hospital & would fill my eyes with tears)They were aware of what I was going through & made me an object of scorn for it. Attacked my manhood, said I wasn’t even a man. All I could do my sister was pray for them individually by name to forgive them, that they know not that their approach was not the correct way to deal with someone who caught his wife cheating on him. The depression of that alone! The death of one of my family members prior. All I could think of was Jesus & I kept telling myself that he would not go reviling his enemies that spit on him, that hit him, that poked fun, that nailed him to his instrument of torture. He knew when to speak & when to keep quiet. Something was telling me inside to keep silent & face these pharisees. Afterwards I was vomiting every day for three weeks so you can imagine what kind of stress that attack put my body under. But I was amazed how Jehovah gave me the strength thru his Holy Spirit to keep myself restrained under evil. Infact it irritated them so much that they had to try & poke fun of my sex life saying something so debased to me that I could never repeat it here. Well I did respond to him telling him that it wasn’t really relevant here,wasn’t true, or any of his business, & he looked at the others with a glee in his eye & said “AHA…We got him now!!”They then manipulated my thinking by saying I can appeal but that I wouldn’t win, that they’d convince the appeal committee to uphold their decision & that if I did decide to appeal that they would never reinstate me. Another elder from another hall actually told me I should threaten them with a lawsuit if they proceed to make an announcement.I mildly told him that for me, I cannot go that route. That Jehovah was trying to teach me something that I just can’t figure out yet. But that Hindsight is 20/20, that I’d eventually find out what it was.But that I just don’t know why I need to approach this situation in the way I did. So out I was for 1 1/2 years, the reinstatement process was actually worse abuse than the DFing. I realized it wasn’t about repentance all the time, but that in this case…The Coordinator’s wife was best friends with my wife, the next elder my wife would do things for his aged mother in law, & the other was physically abusive to me & was making sure I would keep his secret of him hurting me, which now by the way the doctor wants to perform surgery on.
Recently with this newer hall, if not for your advice on how to toughen up, I’m telling you, the way the conversations & stalkings were heading was down a disciplinary situation again, & I had not done anything, but these ones are puffed up on their ego. I’m happy I listened to your more spirited response in this situation cause Fool me once shame on them, fool me twice shame on me. Now so far so good. However the friends have been attacking me in such a horrible way that I now have to speak up to them cause the silent approach doesn’t work with these sorts. Yesterday was sooooo bad that my stomach ached terribly at work! I was bent over in pain. I am not used to being attacked continuously like each week. I ask Jehovah why he allows them in my path. My answer is that I still have something to learn. I’m learning to speak up for myself even more so. I’m learning courage. I’m learning to teach others the importance of treating one another with love. I’m teaching them I’m off limits to their attack & they need to stop. And fortunately Jehovah gave me you to assist in protecting me. Tough Sr.Jacqueline…an angel to the rescue….LOL
Dundee it pains us to see you suffer in this manner. And you are much better man than me. I am very firm with no’s and yes’s. If I say stop I mean stop. I find the organization only respects firmness.
It however can be in different ways. You might be surprised but I stop talking, in fact I won’t open my mouth.
I vote with my feet, walk away.
Christ has died for us once for all times and my death isn’t necessary for redemption. If something would be gained by staying with them, I could see you hanging in there for children, wife, etc. But you are putting your health at risk it seems. I called another ex jw elder and asked him to read your story and see if he thinks he wrote it.
They have you in a mindset of thinking you have to suffer, for Christ yes, but not in a situation where it has no benefit. They will label you. Vomiting sick to stomach these are serious symptoms to be under that much stress for a long time is setting you up for severe, major possibly dangerous health issues. I would speak to my doctor and you might just need to speak to your therapist.
You are welcome to respond to others that post here at will. Br. Peter was mentioning your help as others see you brothers commenting. Brettstone, Daz, this is an excellent opportunity to help others. That is therapy also. You will by God’s grace help so many that you will forget about the problems you faced. Taste and see that he has supplied you with a place of rest.
This is a site that isn’t understood sometimes as it is different from most Bible Student sites. We encourage people to talk on here.
The females at times we can’t print it, but they get it out and someone listens and understands and have been thru it. You can help.
We KNOW FOR A FACT by the astonishing numbers for the summer that is you three that are pulling the persons on here and you express what they feel and you all were elders.
You and I know that carries weigh as Br. Peter carries weigh when he speaks.
Also you must be benefiting someone with your experiences because we (Chuck Maly and I) are blocking apologists that are trying to spam your comments to the very next page or bottom so people can’t find them.
I will pray for you and I think I might give a testimony about you dear brothers from this past month.
I see the Holy Spirit of God in this. Persons that don’t want to talk openly in the back of the site seems comfortable now that we will not betray them and as witnesses are asking for the volumes.
So take care of yourself and your testimony bring tears but it is the truth and experienced to some degree by more than you.
Your openness and candor is refreshing, you are coming to Christ and his load is light and he invites us to get under the yoke with him as he will bear it.
Dundee the house is burning jump before someone pushes you out or you are overcome by the fumes.
This (Bible Students) is like a little tugboat but it can pull an Oceanliner. You are welcome here.
You may dialogue at will here and Bible Students that visit are learning about JW as many don’t know much about witnesses but now we are all exchanging knowledge. In Him, Jacqueline
I was raised in the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses. My parents were baptized when I was about 5 or 6 years old. I saw and heard a lot of questionable things in my years growing up in the organization. The way that everyone was conditioned to spy on one another and all of the “B room” meetings. I learned fear of the organization instead of having a proper fear of God Almighty in heaven. I realized recently that the organization was blocking me from having a close relationship with God. I felt distant from God the entire time. I even watched my mother go through being put on reproof for slander when she was telling the truth about what she reported. These type of labels follow a person to every congregation that they go to. I learned that that’s what happens to tattle tells. They get turned on in the end. All the while she thought she was helping keep the organization clean. I am 43 years old now and never got baptized for fear of being disfellowshipped and I haven’t lead a lifestyle that would cause me to become disfellowshipped by their standards. I feared when my son was pressured to be baptized at the age of 15. I was afraid for him. He was disfellowshipped a year later even though I kept telling the elders he wasn’t ready. I started noticing that every other sentence in the literature was “obey the faithful and discreet slave and you will remain in good standing with God”. I started to feel like I was in the movie “THEY” where a man put on sun glasses and could see the subliminal messages that were all around him. Also cult leaders would declare that obedience to them was obedience to God. I stopped using the literature and read directly from my bible and the next thing I knew the scriptures became clear and understandable to me. I don’t feel the block from God and Jesus now. I knew then that I was in trouble. My mother and I have a good relationship and I don’t want to loose her. I have one daughter that won’t talk to me right now because she found out I’m studying other things other than Jehovah’s Witness and she’s not even a witness she has been studying for 7 years. All I know is the governing body does exactly what the pharisees did and Jesus said they were not of God but of the devil. Where does that leave the organization?
Erika thank you for sharing your experiences. I am surprised you recognized all of this when you were young. I am sorry to hear that your daughter although not a witness herself would shun you. She is studying with the witnesses.
I can predict how this is going to play out. The elders will say I influenced you, although I have not seen not heard anything about you for 20 yrs or more. On your own you have been discussing with Dawn Bible and have a vast concept of the untangled truth about the JW doctrines.
I will wait on a visit from the elders in my community to speak to me as this is the 5th person from such a small area to seek and find the Bible Students unassisted. I will be ready when I let them know how the churches felt when they indoctrinated their members.
You grew up in the same congregation that I was an adult in and I revealed to you that I assisted your Mother to become a witness.
She was treated so badly over these last 40 years. No one will believe the horrors of the area where we were. The Cong had at least allegedly 6 active pedophiles and allegedly one pedacrast, that I encountered in court.
I will stand by you as the heat comes down on you. I will invoke my restraining order to stop any conversing with me. The judge said it would expire at my death.
I was amazed when I visited you to bring you Bibles etc at your deep knowledge of insight into the actual Bible itself! I have not come to grips with the Holy Spirit keeping 30 or more Bible Students hidden from you until it was time to reveal 3 classes at your doorstep. One within walking distance or by phone.
I am so glad you searched on your own and was not pushed or coerced.
But now that you have I will help you. Hopefully you can join with us for the very first time tonight. I will be back home Friday. With Love my little sister and God’s Grace. Jacqueline
Erika , you are welcome here
enjoy the discussions with Christians here
I did not speak much because Im not englishman/ I lack english
read also good testimonials here (for your faith be strenghtened)
http://4womaninthewildernessforum.yuku.com/topic/29/Waiting-for-DF-Announcement
rus v.
My name is Domenic. I don’t have much of a Testimonial. I was born a sinner, lived as a sinner. I was a member of the JW’s for almost 40 years. Shows how stupid I am. I don’t serve God for the reward of life…I do it because my heart will let me do no other.
If there are any jw or inactive jws out there looking for the truth pls get in touch with us.THERE are people who have left the organization & found out that bible students still exist.They are the true followers of the faithful slave that jesus said would provide the food at the right time.Christian love.Bro Richard,VICTORIA,AUSTRALIA.
Richard were you a Jw too?
Yes I was for over 40 years.So was my wife.Now I am a bible student.
Br. Richard Tazzyman, next to the United States, Australia is the largest number on this website. We have over 5,000 visitors per month.
Do you know Steven Unthank of Au. He has been in court and lots of news articles over child sexual abuse. If you google his name you will see the many articles of his fight. It would be comforting for him to hear a kind word from a fellow Australian.
https://twitter.com/StevenUnthank http://www.stevenunthank.com
Dear Sister,Yes I know about STEVEN UNTHANK & I Have been following his articles on sexual child abuse by Jehovahs witnesess.I have also sent him a email this morning.Christian Love as always.Bro Richard
My deat brother Richard Tazzyman I am glad that you read my lifes story. Well I also will like to be in touch with you! This is my email: miroslav.djurak@gmail.com